


Missing the Mark

by wingedbears



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Blood and Fluff, Canon-Typical Violence, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Mafia AU, Oral Sex, Organized Crime, Phone Sex, Slow Burn, Torture, an inordinate amount of fluff for a mafia fic, kylo/ben is a mess, leia is a mama bird, poe is self righteous
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-28
Updated: 2016-05-19
Packaged: 2018-05-16 21:37:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 15
Words: 29,293
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5841889
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wingedbears/pseuds/wingedbears
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Detective First Class, Poe Dameron, is looking into a possible drug case when he stumbles onto the First Order, the prevailing mafia in Brooklyn.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

When Poe first started his day, he thought it would be an average drug bust. Well, average day, anyway, do some paperwork, work on a case, do some more paperwork, hover over Finn like he has something important to do, and then go home. 

Being tied to a chair in one of the First Order’s back rooms (an Austrian restaurant, of all places, like the First Order can’t even do the mafia right) is really not how he thought the day would go. 

He had left Rey questioning a seller, Elan, looking for the pusher, the supplier, anything, but the seller is positively useless. Elan keeps asking if they want deathsticks. Poe pulls Rey aside outside the interrogation room. 

“What about that guy, Jabba? Think this stuff is linked to him?” Jabba was the head of a mob on the east side of Brooklyn. He dealt exclusively in drugs, murder, and Italian food, because the guy is so old school he’s practically made out of bullets and cannoli. If this seller was linked up to him, it would be a real feather in their cap. 

Poe wonders briefly if anyone actually says, “feather in my cap” anymore. Maybe he should bring it back, but then Rey is talking, and he focuses in on her.  
“-area. Might have to do with one of the other guys. Maybe Salacious C?” Jabba’s number one lackey. 

“Okay, you keep on this guy, bring in Finn if you need help.” Rey nods. “I’ll follow up on Salacious C.

The 21st precinct is Jabba’s territory. But Jabba has long been on his way out, no one wanting to take over a measly eight blocks in Brooklyn.

Poe meets Salacious C at their usual place, the Carniceria Loa Number 7. Poe reminds himself to pick up some horchata mix on the way out. He buys two pan dulces, and waits. Salacious C shows up in no time. Tiny, and always cackling, Salacious isn’t the most friendly of snitches, but the guy is reliable. Finn has taken to writing thank you notes (Poe intercepts them, because he knows a bad idea when he sees one). 

Salacious stuffs a concha in his mouth, and starts talking. “Nah, deathsticks aren’t our thing. Boss keeps it on the regular. Coke, you know.” He waves his spindly hand around. 

Poe is nodding, keeping a lookout on the door. “Do you know who supplies it?”

Salacious laughs. It’s a creepy, high pitched giggle. “Broad named Phasma. She works over at Werkstatt. Lower East Side.” 

Poe sighs. That’s not his district, which means he’ll have to call the 87th. 

So he gets in his car, a ‘72 Mercury Cougar (his mom’s back in the day, and that’s why he absolutely refuses to junk it, even if the second gear is grinding out). 

He calls the 87th and lets them know what’s up. But it’s his and Rey’s collar, so he refuses to just hand the paperwork over. 

He pulls up to Werkstatt, and parks the car. He leans over the wheel and peers out through the windshield. It looks nice, not very hip, and weirdly empty for what should be a lunch rush. 

He walks in and identifies himself to the hostess, who nods and leads him to the kitchen. 

Phasma is a tall, white blond, woman. She’s also wielding a chef’s knife so adeptly that he’s a little scared. 

“Phasma,” says the hostess, “this is Detective Dameron, from the 21st. He’d like to ask a few questions.” 

Phasma nods curtly, and the girl leaves, spine straight. Phasma doesn’t pause, just slides over a cut of meat and starts whacking at it with a meat hammer. “Well?” she asks. 

Well, courtesies out of the way, I guess, Poe thinks, and says, “Ever heard of Jabba?”

Phasma laughs, but it’s more like a loud exhalation of air than anything that could be implied amusing. “Everyone knows about Jabba,” she says, still efficiently whacking away.

When she doesn’t add anything else, Poe moves on. “Deathsticks?”

Phasma doesn’t answer. 

Poe is about to ask again, when she says, “I don’t have time for drugs. I’m running a restaurant.”

“I’ve heard otherwise.”

“Tell it to my lawyer, Detective,” she says, and Poe knows a shut down when he hears one. He thanks her for her time as un-sarcastically as possible and walks out of the kitchen. There’s only one or two diners, and the tiny and scary hostess is nowhere to be found, so he walks to the front then down the hall to the door marked employees only.

He doesn’t have a search warrant, but he’s not really expecting to see boxes clearly marked “deathsticks” or anything. He does want some paperwork on this restaurant however, because it’s too damned convenient that the supplier has one at all. 

He’s almost to a door that looks like it might be the office, when a hand comes down on his shoulder. 

“Sir,” says a high voice, and when he turns around, it’s the hostess. “I’m going to have to ask you to leave,” she says.

“Oh, sorry, looking for a restroom,” Poe says easily, the policeman’s oldest lie.

The girl doesn’t look like she’s buying it either. “Paying customers only,” she says, when clearly she means “Get the fuck out.”

“Right.” Poe makes a move to leave, but then feels a sharp pain in the back of his neck and blacks out.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poe and Kylo meet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Violence happens in this chapter, please skip if it is not your thing, or triggers you. See end notes for details/spoilers.

When Poe comes to, he’s tied to a chair. He takes a moment to reorient himself. It’s still the backroom of the restaurant, he can tell by the smell of fried pork in the air. He tests his bonds, arms - zip tied, fuck - behind him, and his feet to the chair legs. He was kind of banking on ropes, but that’s a Jabba move, more about looks than actual efficiency. The room is dark, one light behind him. He’s facing an empty chair and a wall. The wall has labor laws posted, which Poe finds kind of ironic. 

The real question here is why these guys would make such a bold move, Poe thinks. He can hardly pin them down to the drugs on hearsay or his sneaking around. They know he’s a cop, which is bad not only for Poe, but for them, if any of this made it back to the precinct. 

Poe sighs, stretches his head back and takes a deep breath. Might as well focus and try to find a way out. He’s leaning forward to his toes, to see if they’ll hold his weight, because he’ll make like a turtle if it means getting out of here and back to his apartment and his dog, when he hears the door open behind him. 

Poe leans back again, ready to face whoever this is. 

It’s a man, a tall one, and Poe finds him…striking. Dark brown eyes look out over his strong nose, ears stubbornly stick out from his hair, and his lips are plush. His dark hair softens the strange features of this man’s face, pale and marked.

Focus, Poe thinks, because this is not some honeypot come to tell him about the secret menu. 

The guy sits down in front of him, but still doesn’t say anything. 

Poe watches as this guy reaches down into his pocket and pulls out the tiniest pocket knife he’s ever seen. It’s so positively dinky that Poe thinks it actually might be one of those nail file things that come attached to the clipper.

The guy looks at him, looks at the file, and back at Poe and raises an eyebrow. The silence is bothering him more than the threat of this guy’s creativity with whatever he can do with the knife.

“I’ve seen bigger,” Poe says. There, a dick joke. That’ll clear up the tension for sure.

The guy’s face goes blank and hard and without any reply he stabs Poe’s left thigh. 

Poe screams. That nail file is no joke. His whole body is flushed, suddenly, everything focused on that tiny knife in his thigh. He pants, then says, “I guess it really is in how you use it.”

There’s a knock on the door and a muffled voice, sharp, “Hey Kylo, Phasma wants to talk to you.”

Kylo leans forward, his hair brushes up against Poe’s cheek, and whispers, “Don’t go anywhere.” Kylo leaves, assured of his power in the situation. And he’s not wrong.

Poe can hear the faint scream from his flight or fight response. He’s heard of this guy before, second in standing in the First Order. The mafia that stretches from Crown Heights to Brighton Beach. Poe was so used to Jabba’s gang that he kind of forgot that there was something bigger outside Bushwick. 

And Kylo Ren? He’s heard story after story about this guy, the way he interrogates, the deals that he runs, the adopted son of Snoke who is the head of the First Order. Poe is in deep shit, but he still doesn’t know why. What could the First Order possibly want with him? Why would they show their hand when he was only after the supplier in a drug case?

Poe keeps running through the possible answers, but gets distracted because every time he twitches, the knife in his leg moves, which starts the pain zinging through his body all over again. 

He hears the door unlatch behind him.

He reflexively seizes up, jarring the knife again. He hisses in pain. 

The slow clack of boot heels comes to his ears, and it’s not Kylo who takes a seat in front of him. 

This guy has pale red hair, blue eyes, and a permanent sneer carved onto his face. Poe has only known him for a few seconds, but he can totally tell that this isn’t the kind of guy that hangs around the water cooler and jokes around, so to speak. 

“Poe Dameron,” the man says, crossing his legs. 

Poe manages to roll his eyes in something that’s not pain. Everyone here is so dramatic. 

“Sorry I didn’t catch your name,” Poe says. 

“Hux,” he replies. He leans forward, takes a look at the knife in Poe’s thigh. He hums in interest, and Poe thinks that he’ll take it out, stab him in the other leg, maybe. “I see my colleague has already started. We’ll get that information out of you yet.”

“Yeah, about that, Kylo just stabbed me and left. Exactly what are you after?” 

Hux looks at him, brows drawn together. “You can’t be serious,” he says. 

“Does it have to with the deathsticks? Because that’s quite the show of cards, there.”

Hux snorts. “No. Luke Skywalker.”

Luke Skywalker pissed off the First Order years and years ago. Poe’s first assignment was watch duty while Skywalker was in the safehouse. All he really knew is that Luke managed to be a witness to a trial that brought down Palpatine, the leader of the mob the Empire, a vast and wide organization that spread out across all of New York and into New Jersey. Luke Skywalker ended an era. The First Order was desperately trying to revive it, opening old establishments, renaming them, making them bigger, better. 

And Luke Skywalker? If they got their hands on him, that would be a message for the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kylo uses a knife to stab Poe in the leg.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Same warnings as last chapter, folks. Please be cautious in reading if you are triggered by violence.

Poe knows where Luke is, a complete accident. There were some files Poe should have never seen, but he can’t erase what he knows. Poe wonders why him, but that means either there’s either a mole in the precinct, or that the First Order has a first class hacker that’s figured out Poe was on that duty that day. And Poe unknowingly walked into the First Order’s web.

Poe is brought back to the present when Hux starts to look too interested in the knife in his leg. He’s leaning in and has his hand around the knife handle, starts to twist, which starts Poe screaming.

This is when Kylo slams back in. He shoves Hux off Poe, and Hux lands on the hard concrete. Kylo shouts, “What the hell are you doing?”

Hux looks at him, askance. “Getting answers,” Hux spits out.

“That’s my job. You don’t mess with him.”

Poe wonders how he got here, in the middle of a pissing contest between two mobsters.

Hux gets off the floor. “Fine,” he hisses. “Snoke will hear about this.”

Kylo leans in. “Snoke wants Skywalker, Hux. Not snitches.”

Poe winces. Ouch.

Hux looks at Kylo, like Kylo is beneath him. Hux walks out, saying nothing.

Poe notices that Kylo has some brass knuckles, and a bottle of vodka.

Poe nods to Kylo’s handfuls. “More of a craft beer guy myself,” he says.

Kylo gives him a weird look, but opens the bottle regardless, and pours some on Poe’s thigh, the knife still protruding. It stings, the pain zinging through his body, his thigh in agony. He can't stop moving his leg, making the wound worse.

“Don't want you to get infected,” Kylo says. Poe looks at him incredulously.

The vodka bottle is set down in the plastic chair in front of Poe, and Kylo slips on the brass knuckles. He looks at Poe, says, “I'm looking for Luke Skywalker.”

Poe says, “Tell me about it.”

Kylo doesn’t laugh. Poe doesn’t know what to expect here, doesn’t know if he’ll actually get out of this alive.

Kylo says, “Anything you want to add before we begin?” He raises a softly arched brow.

And a thousand zingers run through Poe’s head but what he lands on is, “We just started?”

Kylo throws a punch. It’s strong, he’s strong, and Poe feels like his skull just cracked in two, which is entirely possible.

Poe has been in a fist fight. He’s received more than his fair share of blows, but this is something else. The pain is sharp, full and throbbing. That’s to be expected. It’s the pain underneath that, the layer of vertigo into a sharp abyss, that’s what’s new. It’s just so much more.

Kylo throws another punch, but it’s a short stab into his stomach. Poe is aware he’s making noise, the groaning yelling that comes with pain.

Kylo stops occasionally to ask about Luke.

“I don’t know,” Poe will answer, only to get another punch.

This goes on for a while, how long, Poe is unsure of, because concepts aside from pain mean nothing now.

Kylo grabs his face with his left hand, Poe’s neck limp. Poe looks blearily up at Kylo.

“Tell me,” Kylo says. “I’ll let you go, if you tell me.” His voice is oddly soft. Deep.

“Fuck you,” Poe says, his voice scratchy from screaming. He’d spit if he had any energy.

Kylo’s lips thin out, pressed together in anger. He picks up the vodka, splashes some of it on Poe’s face.

Poe throws up on himself, it hurts so fucking much.

Poe expects a snort, a laugh, something, to confirm how pathetic he really is. Kylo does none of these things. He leaves the room, and Poe wavers in and out of consciousness for a while. He’s waiting for Kylo, but the next thing he knows, Finn is in front of him, telling him everything is going to be alright.

He can hear Rey shouting about an ambulance, and then, nothing again.

 

Poe is not in the habit of passing out.

But he comes to again, and this time he’s tethered to an IV, and Finn and Rey are asleep in the chairs next to his bed. Poe feels his heart become full with love for the two of them. They are curled up next to each other, Finn’s head on Rey’s shoulder.

He doesn’t want to wake them up, wants them to get some sleep, he’s halfway there himself, but then Rey opens her eyes, some instinct telling her she’s being watched.

“Poe!” she says, getting up, regardless of Finn.

“Hey,” Poe croaks out. Rey reaches for the water at his bedstand, ready and waiting for him. He sips, slowly.

“Good to see you up,” Rey says, smiling from ear to ear. “You scared the bejezus out of us.”

“How did you guys…” Poe trails off. He notices that Finn is starting to rouse, rubbing his face, groaning.

“You called the 87th, remember? Said something about the drug case leading you to the lower east side, and they called us, asked if you were with us, since you weren’t answering your cell.” She smirks. “Glad you followed procedure.”

“Me too,” he says, and takes another sip of water. “Do you know what the damage is?” he asks her.

She turns back to look at Finn. “They wouldn’t tell us, we’re not your next of kin.” She squints at him. “Probably should get a nurse in here,” she says, and before Poe can protest, say that this is the nicest thing he’s done all day (if it has only been one day), Rey is pushing the call nurse button.

Poe sighs, and waits.

The nurse urges Rey and Finn to wait outside, but Poe insists they stay, if only to stop Rey from starting a riot. She’s in full protective mode now.

Turns out he’s got a fractured cheekbone and that stab wound in his thigh, and a few broken ribs. He’s laid up in the hospital for another day, in which he begs Finn to take care of BB8, and for Rey not to hunt down the First Order. She promises, but he can tell it’s still on her to do list. It doesn’t need to be, though. Because Poe is going to get to them first.

Captain Organa comes to visit, and he has to tell her what happened, that they’re looking after her brother.

Leia gives him a firm but kind look, tells him that it’ll be okay. She gives him two weeks off, paid, and tells him to rest.

This is the start of many orders under Captain Leia Organa that Poe chooses to ignore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again for reading! If you like, come talk to me about trashcans in space on [ tumblr ](http://www.wingedbears.tumblr.com).


	4. Chapter 4

Poe knows only a little about Luke Skywalker. He had taken down Palpatine, head of the Empire, along with Vader, an old school badass, but had managed to slip out under the witness protection program. But if the First Order is after him, then Luke is in some deep shit.

Poe needs to make sure that Luke is safe, and the only way he can do that, is to actually go out there. Poe made it out from the First Order alive, so he knows there’s a giant target on his back.

He scrapes up enough money, and flies out to Chicago under the pretense of visiting distant cousins. When he lands at O’Hare he rents a car and takes off into Iowa. It’s flat and full of corn, as far as Poe can tell, and he wonders how Luke has managed to blend in.

It’s a three and a half hour drive to his destination, so Poe cranks up the music and burns rubber, knowing he can pull the cop on a mission ploy if he has to.

The town center is small, and honestly, Poe almost misses it, he’s driving past so many farms. He gets into town, and knows he has to be careful here. Luke is in danger, but to what extent Poe doesn’t know. And if Poe sets off any alarms by looking into the situation, then there’s little Poe can actually do.

He’s in the community center checking out the flyers for local activities, avoiding the workers there by looking incredibly interested in the bulletin board.

But that’s when he sees it: a poster for a meditation class led by Owen Banks. Held in the park behind the post office, two in the afternoon. For questions, call Owen at 555-8543.

Bingo.

Poe calls the number, knowing there’s only a handful of people that would put up a flyer like this, and Luke is one of them.

The number has been disconnected. Shit.

Poe heads over to the information desk and puts his best smile to ask for a phone book.

The lady behind the counter is immune to Poe’s charms, but thunks the Yellow Pages on the counter. It’s from 2006, but Poe thinks not much has really changed here, so he starts under the health section. And there, Zen and Meditation Services, and an address. He thanks the woman and quickly types the address into his Google Maps.

 

 

He rides up to the place, a run down ranch, with a tiny garden patch in the side yard. Across the road is a field of corn. Naturally.

Poe knocks on the door and waits. After a few minutes he pulls out a tiny pick and jiggles the handle just so, and it releases. The place is a fucking mess.

It looks like someone, Luke, was just there. Like everything is in place for a cup of tea, but it was left as it brewed. Poe expects Luke to turn the corner, for the tea to still be hot, but the cup is cold to the touch.

Poe rifles through some mail, opened, and piles of newspapers stacked on the kitchen counter, looking for any hint of Luke’s whereabouts. Poe starts to rifle through a pile of notes, old religion books open, and sees a photo marking a page. The photo is a shot of a family. It’s the set up of a formal pose, tallest in the back, all in a row, but the faces look candid. There’s beaming smiles on these faces. Poe recognizes his Captain, Luke, arms slung around each other, and Han Solo, Captain Organa’s estranged husband, and Chewie, the tall man that Han is never seen without. The only person he doesn’t recognize is a boy in front of the grownups, his smile soft, eyes bright.

The back of the photo is dated 22 years ago, and the only name that Poe doesn’t recognize is Ben.

Poe tucks away the photo, and searches for other clues, coming up with nothing before crashing on the bed.

 

He’s puttering around the next morning when his phone vibrates in his pocket. It’s a blocked number, a text.

//Found him yet?

Poe’s mind is immediately trying to figure out who this is, who would know. Finn knows he’s out of town, Rey and Captain Organa know that he’s on leave. But he has their numbers, and the Captain would never know that he was in Iowa. Right?

He wants to type in, new phone, who dis?

But decides to play it cool.

//found who?

There’s a long wait. Poe stares at the phone, willing it to reply.

//I can help.

Oh man, this asshat uses correct punctuation in his texts, leaving out Rey as the sender.

Poe replies, //no thanks, I’m good

As soon as he hits send, he gets //I’m better.

Oh. Poe does not expect this, doesn’t know where to go from here. He needs to know, so he goes for it, //who is this?

//Let’s say I’m an acquaintance.

//So I know you

//We’ve met.

Okay, Poe thinks, now we’re getting somewhere. He leans up against the counter, inadvertently shoving some of the stacks of newspapers aside.

//And you know what I’m doing? That’s more than an acquaintance would know

Poe waits.

//I know what you’re doing, yes.

Ugh, Poe thinks, this is like pulling teeth. He needs to get out of the place, feeling like he’s being watched, and the person on the other end is standing out in the field across the road, texting him like a technologically savvy child of the damned.

He takes a quick look out the window, but doesn’t see anything out of the ordinary.

Poe takes a deep breath. Okay, just go at it like you, it’s gotten you this far. The guy knows what he’s doing?

Poe sends a winky face emoticon.

He stuffs his phone in his pocket and gets in his car, headed back to Chicago. The phone buzzes a little after he passes the state line.

He waits, and pulls over at the next gas station.

He looks down, and laughs.

//Try again.

And then, a city emoji.

What the hell? Poe thinks.

//Look, I know I’m a detective, but I’m going to need more than that

//I can’t give you anything else.

//try?

There’s a pause, and then the reply rolls in.

//Find Kylo Ren.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Poe asks aloud. Luckily he’s just in the car, so no one looks at him like he’s nuts.

Crafting his next text takes him a minute, just because he’s so damned angry at this person.

//why

Because that’s what it all boils down to. Past all the anger, the question is why Kylo Ren, and why would Poe ever go back.

His phone buzzes.

A winky face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!


	5. Chapter 5

Poe flies out from Chicago.  When he gets back to the city, he spends a day with BB-8, letting the Pomeranian toddle around Prospect Park for a while.  His phone has been silent aside from the occasional texts from Finn about the bullpen.  

He does text that blocked number back.  But nothing comes from it, like it never happened, except how it did, the conversation is still saved on his phone.  

When his thigh starts twinging again, he stops at a park bench.  The cold is starting to creep into his bones again.

If he did go after Kylo Ren, what would be the point?  He’s banking on some stranger to be right, for Kylo Ren to actually have any answers that he needs.  

For now, he knows that Luke is gone, and that there’s a photo in his apartment of the Organa-Solo family, and this mysterious texter trying to guide him.  So two leads, the photo, and the texter.  Poe sighs and leans his head back.  The last of winter is leaving, but the cold will stay until May.  BB-8 whines, and looks up at him.  His tiny paws are on top of Poe’s foot.  Poe feels his heart start to warm back up.   

“It’s okay, buddy.”  They walk slowly back to Poe’s apartment.

  


The internet doesn’t have much to say about Ben Solo, or Ben Organa, or any of the possible combinations thereof.  All he knows is that this guy existed, at least until sometime after Westpoint, then Army, then nothing.  Not an MIA, not a discharge, not even a promotion, Ben Organa-Solo just...disappears.

Which is strange, because there should be at least something.  

It might explain why the Captain has never mentioned any kid, which Poe feels kind of affronted by.

Poe leans over for his coffee, growing cold on the bookshelf, next to the futon.  The morning has been a slow one, in that Poe has no idea what to do when he doesn’t have to work.  He puttered around the kitchen, read all his emails, and everywhere he went was the little skittering sound of BB-8’s claws on the floor.

Now, he’s settled on the couch, BB-8 settled beside him (he really can’t refuse the orange fluff ball anything) and contemplating calling up the Captain, to ask her.  But that would mean telling Captain Organa that he went on a wild goose chase after her brother.  Not exactly bed rest.  

 Poe picks up his phone (somewhere under a huffy BB-8) and thumbs through the texts he sent to that blocked number.

//FUCK YOU 

Then,

//No, seriously fuck you who the fuck do you think you are 

But nothing.

And there hasn’t been anything since.  Poe thinks over his options.  He’s already in deep either way, so he takes a deep breath and tries one more time.

//How does one go about looking for a mob man/asshole?

Poe sets the phone down, ready to go back to the search for Ben, but jumps at the buzz of the phone.

//I imagine it’s a lot like fishing.

//Boring? 

//You use bait. 

Bait.  Well, that’s Poe all over.  He’s already got a target on his back from escaping somehow, for knowing where Luke is (was), and he’s in it already for trying to track Luke down.

Poe crates BB-8 and picks up his keys; he has a sudden hankering for schnitzel.  

 

 

Poe goes down and actually parks three blocks down from Werkstatt because he’s not really sure about how to go about this.  He needs to make his presence known, so he ambles right past the restaurant and walks to the cafe the half block down.  

He waits, and soon enough someone is sitting down in front of him just as he’s enjoying the cafe con leche the barista whipped up for him.

And entirely too convenient, it’s Kylo Ren.  He doesn’t say anything for a while, which drives Poe crazy.  He’s searching for something to say other than "fuck you" because that’s mostly what he’s feeling right now.  

 Kylo looks haggard, like he hasn’t got any sleep in the past week, shadows lying under his eyes. 

“Good,” Poe thinks. 

Kylo looks up at him from the table, and Poe kinda forgot how weirdly hot this guy was.  His face is long, and his eyes dark. 

“So what, you’re not gonna get coffee?” 

Kylo looks at him like he’s the crazy one, which, yeah, okay, he’s willingly walked back into enemy territory to save his Captain’s brother, and he’s just mouthing off.

Kylo huffs and jerks his head, indicating the outside.  Kylo gets up without checking if Poe is following him.   

When Poe gets outside, Kylo is digging around in his jacket for a lighter, a cigarette already hangs loosely from his lips.  He sees Poe and starts walking down the street.  Poe catches up and walks beside him, breathing in that smell of leather and tobacco, his eyes on Kylo’s long thick fingers.   

Kylo takes a sharp turn into the nearest alley.

“This your home?” Poe quips.

 Kylo rolls his eyes and sighs.  “Are you looking for trouble?”  Kylo asks, taking a drag, “Is this some kind of thing with you?”

“No!”  Poe says, even when the answer is clearly yes.

It’s entirely possible.  This man stabbed him in the thigh and broke his face.  But some benefactor knows something about Kylo Ren enough to know that he can help, somehow.   

“I’m taking you in,” Kylo says, and Poe thinks _oh no_ .  “And I still need that information,”  Kylo continues, flicking away his cigarette, and Poe thinks _oh shit_.   

Poe tries to make a run for it, but Kylo’s long arms reach out and snag his jacket, yanking him back and down.  He’s hauled back up and pinned against the cold brick wall, Kylo’s arm braced across his chest.  

Poe can barely breathe, and Kylo has him in such a way that he can barely move, either, but he manages to swing a leg up to kick at those outrageous legs. Look, Poe has a type okay, and long legs just get to him somehow.  He wonders how it’s possible to hate someone and find them attractive, and feels like his mom would probably give him a talking to about choices, if she was still around.

Kylo looks at him like he’s an annoying puppy, then reaches down to Poe’s hand and _pinches_ and Poe’s arm feels like it’s breaking. “Oh man, I’m messing with a ninja,” he thinks as he tries to move his body to break away, but the nerves in his arm are screaming.

Kylo then has the audacity to pull out his phone from his other pocket like it’s no big deal, and starts swiping on it.  He notices the phone is pink, and that doesn’t seem to be Kylo’s style.  He can hear a call going out, and Poe manages to jerk out, flailing in the opposite direction of Kylo, but it’s something.  Kylo drops the phone and gives Poe a left hook to his face that knocks him right out.   

When he comes to, the fine officers of the the 87th and an ambulance is there.

Poe is getting a little tired of this passing out shit.

 Poe sits obediently in the ambulance, a thin blanket wrapped around his shoulders, answering questions.   

“Look, Dameron, I don’t mind telling you this isn’t going to go anywhere,” Pava tells him, flipping through her notes.

 “I know, Jessika.  One fight in an alleyway isn’t going to break down a mob.” 

Pava gives him a look of pity.  “Go home,” she says, “try not to get into anymore trouble.”  She pauses.  “I’m serious.  I know you won’t listen, but get some rest.  Your face isn’t doing you any favors right now.”  Pava’s nothing if not blunt.

 Poe gingerly touches his cheek, feeling the hot skin there, throbbing.  He nods shortly, and Pava walks off to talk to her partner.  

Poe looks into the alley, wondering where he went wrong, because it seems like a series of terrible decisions stacked up against him.  A flash of pink catches his eye.  No one’s noticed, it’s been kicked under a sack of garbage and is poking out, pink and bright, and then he realizes that that’s Kylo’s phone. That after Kylo was done punching Poe’s lights out (again), that he dropped his phone. 

There is a moment that Poe thinks about it.  About just handing this over to the Jessika, going back to work and letting the whole thing drop.  He savors the thought, because instead of being a good policeman and telling the 87th about the evidence, he clams up and desperately hopes no one bags the phone. 

Afterwards, he rides back to the scene of the crime, makes sure no one is around and ducks under the tape.  Poe sees the phone under the trash bag, poking out. He picks it up, the screen cracked.  It’s locked.  Of course.

So he gently puts the phone in his pocket and takes his own out, and calls Rey.

He can’t tell Finn what’s going on, because the guy is basically a muffin when it comes down to it.  A lovable muffin Poe will never let out of his life, but a muffin.  So he tells Rey because he trusts her with this shit, she grew up on the streets scared and running; taking care of herself.

 After Rey stops yelling at him, she decides she wants to help.   

“I want Kylo Ren for what he’s done,” she says.  “I’m doing this for that, for you, not for anything else.”

Poe emphatically agrees, so long as he has his partner in this.  He already feels a thousand percent better, knowing Rey is with him.

 Now she and Poe are not really breaking the law, but definitely bending the rules a bit when they take it into the IT guy and say it’s for a case.  Which it is.  Just not the one they’re working on.  

 

 

The IT guy, Threepio, is nervous and talkative.   

“I usually don’t do these things, I’m more of coder,” he says. 

The room they’re in is dark, despite the humming of halogen lights.  Threepio, looks over his desk to his colleague, a short and roundish man who is chewing on a cigar and typing furiously.  

 “Artoo?”  Threepio asks, and hands it over.  

Artoo huffs.  He hooks it up to his computer, and a few taps later he hands it back over to Poe and Finn.  “Fucking Apple,” he says,  which sets Threepio off, indignantly squawking.

Rey and Poe slowly walk back out of the room, because this seems like an age old argument that they don’t need to be part of. 

Rey and Poe wait anxiously until they’re out of the precinct and safe at Poe’s apartment to look at the phone, not wanting to take any chances.  They hover over it, and Rey wins the unspoken fight of who gets to hold it.  But there’s not much on the phone, just a few pictures of sunsets and a dog occasionally, which Rey is confused about.  “Why put this on a burner?” she asks.

Poe feels his heart squeeze. 

Rey keeps looking.  Candy Crush, level 92, no friends.  “Ugh, how is he past me?” she asks.

“More importantly, why are you guys still playing Candy Crush?” Poe asks, instinctively reaching to hold the phone again.  Rey rolls her eyes, and yanks it back. 

She scrolls through the phone log, and there’s one call, dated yesterday evening, to 911.  Poe’s whole mind has gone static.

 Kylo called the police. 

“Go to the texts,” Poe says, stiff and urgent.   

Listed under Poe’s number is the message last sent. 

//You use bait.

  



	6. Chapter 6

There’s a few notes, but it’s all a jumble, one long string of letters after another, and ‘M e-119’. Nothing else.

“What the hell,” Rey says. “It’s a code,” she looks at him, “We need to find out what it says.”

Poe spends his last day off trying to figure out exactly what any of the code mean. The shortest one is just numbers, but no matter what he can think of nothing makes sense.

He knows that it might be his last move, here, but the Captain might know what to do, even if she tells him to hand it over to the 87th. 

He’d do it, but keep looking anyway. 

The rest of the morning is a bust. 

Poe sighs, and knows that he has to call Captain Organa. He calls, listening to the automated voice tell him if he knows his party’s extension to dial it now, and is pressing in 1-1-9 without thinking, and that when it hits him. M e-119. Extension 119 is a direct line to Captain Organa’s office. What the rest means he has no idea, but he’s fumbling over this idea when Captain Organa picks up, answers professionally, and Poe’s mind is flat-lining. He says, “Captain I need to speak to you.”

“Yes, I imagine so, Dameron,” she says, sounding amused. “You called me.”

“No,” he says, shaking it off. “In private.” 

There’s a pause, and she says, “Alright. Meet me at my house at 8 tonight.” 

 

Poe shows up that night, a little early. He has the phone in his pocket. 

Leia welcomes in from the stoop, waving him through to the study. Poe has been here before, during parties the Captain held. The house is warm and inviting, dark tones of the wood floors reflected in the details of the art. There are few family photos. He thinks briefly about the photo he found in Luke’s house in Iowa, the family picture with someone he’s never met. 

Poe shuts the door to the study behind him. Leia is already sitting down in a brown leather arm wing chair. She gestures for him to take a seat in an identical chair opposite her.

She looks at him, brown eyes warm and kind. “What is this about, Poe?”

He spills everything: trying to find Luke, running into Kylo, what happened after. 

Her face has been carefully blank this whole time so he doesn’t know where to go here, until he pulls out the phone. She’s swiping around on the device for a while, and her face drops into an incredible sadness, tears rising up in her eyes. 

“You said this was Kylo’s phone?” she asks. Poe nods. She clears her throat then lays the phone between the two of them on the ottoman. The screen glows, a picture of a pit bull looking up to the camera, its head tilted.

“What I’m about to tell you,” she says, “you can’t tell anyone.”

“Okay,” he says, breathless.

“Kylo is my son.”

Poe feels like the world tilts, just a little, enough where it looks the same but it’s totally disorienting. 

Ben. Kylo Ren is Ben. 

Leia is saying, “He grew up as Ben Organa-Solo.” She reaches out and wistfully swipes through the phone. 

And the detective in him won’t let up even now, and he asks, “What do the notes mean?”

She shrugs. “It was risky at all for him to put any of this down. If the First Order found out…”

“What is he doing in the First Order?” he asks, hoping for an answer, any clue as to why Kylo would lead him back to himself, why he would drop his phone, and what information is locked on there that is so important. 

Leia looks him right in the eye and says, “I can honestly tell you that I don’t know.” She sighs, heavily and world weary. “I won’t tell you what to do,” she continues. “But you can’t let anyone else know about this.”

Poe nods. 

“I mean it Dameron. It’s both of us on the line, here.” She hands him the phone. 

Poe knows that it’s time for him to leave.

 

While Poe knows that now is a good time to stop, he can’t help but wonder what Kylo Ren is doing. The texts Kylo sent implied that he would help Poe try to find Luke, but Poe now knowing that it was Kylo Ren on the other end he couldn’t trust that Kylo wouldn’t kill Luke. Even for the sake of the First Order. He needs to know more about Kylo Ren, before he can actually trust him. 

Poe goes into work the next day. There’s a cake and everything for his return, the words Happy Birthday scrawled in blue icing. Poe knows that someone swung by the grocery store bakery at the last minute, but he’s so touched that there’s cake he doesn’t care. 

Poe is elbow deep in paperwork, when Salacious C comes and sits at Poe’s desk. 

“Hey Poe,” Salacious says, rubbing his nose. He looks exhausted, and like no amount of sleep will cure whatever ails him. 

“Salacious, you know that I call you,” Poe says quietly. Technically, he doesn’t have anything concrete on Salacious, so he can’t book him. However, Salacious Crumb in the precinct isn’t a good sign. 

And it turns out Poe is right.

“He what?” Captain Organa asks sharply.

“He’s turning himself in,” Poe says. He can hardly believe it, except, “Jabba was killed. By Snoke.”

Leia crosses her arms. “Okay. Talk to Crumb, see what you can find. Get a location. Meanwhile, I’ll send Rey and Finn out for door to door investigating.”

Poe steps back into the interrogation room to wring some information out of Salacious.

“Look, I told you, there’s nowhere else for me to turn,” Salacious says.

“Okay, but I’m trying to help you here. Give me something on the First Order, we can cut you a deal. We can deal with them,” Poe says. 

Salacious clears his throat. “Alright, they killed Jabba last night. Near that dry cleaning place, you know.” Poe looks at the two way mirror behind Salacious and nods, knowing that Rey and Finn are watching. 

“What else, tell me about what happened.”

“Snoke came in with this really tall guy, called him Kylo.”

Poe feels like his body is vibrating like a tuning fork. 

“So this guy walks in, and doesn’t even acknowledge Jabba, even though Jabba is yelling at them to get out, and the gang is rounding up on them, and Kylo just shoots Jabba. Right here,” Salacious points right above his right eye. “Jabba drops. Snoke tells everyone, that the First Order is taking over.” Salacious shrugs. “Those guys are crazy. Snoke is grooming that Kylo guy, making him do tests and shit. Wants all his people to know who’s in control.”

All Poe can think about is whether or not Ben is safe. 

People start turning themselves in, better to be alive and incarcerated than whatever happens there. One woman comes in, weeping. Finn sits with her and takes her information, but in the end, she requests Poe. Poe is confused, but agrees.

Her name is Oola, and she worked as a private dancer for Jabba. “It was fucking miserable,” she says. Poe feels bad that all he can offer is coffee. She turns it down. “I can’t,” she sobs. “I’m pregnant.”

Oh _fuck_. “Water?” Poe offers. She nods.

Poe comes back with water and some pamphlets on abuse and pregnancy. She looks more put together. He slides over the tissues Finn left in the interrogation room.

“Can you tell me anything?” he asks, gently.

She looks up, her dark eyes almost black, her dark skin looks flat, almost greenish. “Jabba found out I was pregnant. I was going to have to get rid of it, but, the baby…” she looks at Poe. “You have to understand, it was like I suddenly had my life back, like I could do something other than be a sick man’s whore,” she spits out. 

“Jabba killed the father,” she continues. “I was so happy that Snoke took over, glad Jabba was finally dead. I thought, this is my chance, maybe.” 

She looks up, furious. “Snoke wanted the same damn thing.” 

Poe swallows. “How did you get out?” he asks. Poe is rethinking about who Finn left the tissues for. 

She sighs, takes a sip of water. “I didn’t.” 

“There’s a man there, Snoke’s second.” She leans in. “This is on the record, right?”

Poe nods, but his mind is just filled with the thought that this is Kylo Ren, this is Ben she’s talking about. 

“This man, Kylo, she says, he comes to me, and I’m thinking this is it, right? Snoke told me that night before to make an appointment, or else. So I’m packing up my shit when Kylo comes in, and I think this is it, this is how I die.

Kylo looks at me, asks if I wanted to do it, if I wanted to abort the baby. I told him no. I told him I wasn’t doing that, no one can tell me what to do, not anymore, and he looks at me, and nods. Tells me to get the fuck out, now, don’t pack, nothing, just leave. Don’t come back, go to the police, then move somewhere else.”

Oola pauses. “He said you would help.” 

Poe’s eyes go wide. 

He does, helps Oola to a cell for the night, and calls her relatives out of state. They’re relieved, and come and get her the next morning, and Poe himself drives as an escort for her to the state line. 

The whole time he’s rethinking about Ben.

What made him tell Oola to leave, what made him reach out to Poe, what made him leave his family in the first place. 

The people that would have the most info is the 87th, because that’s where the First Order first popped up.

Poe starts wandering the 87th precinct, asking for files from Sergeant Antilles, because Antilles owes him one. And there’s report after report on the First Order, but practically nothing on Kylo Ren. 

He even does some door to door investigating, but everyone clams up before Poe can get any information. 

Poe wonders if this all an incredibly stupid idea. He heads out of the 87th evidence lock up, and down to the street to grab some coffee from the deli before it closes, as the coffee in the bullpen tastes God awful. 

He orders the coffee and hears the jingle of the bell go off behind him, and the guy behind the counter looks over Poe to whomever is standing there, and nods, placing Poes coffee on the counter and walks to the back. 

“Hey, I need to pay you,” Poe says. But then he looks behind him.

It’s Ben.

Poe takes in a breath, uncertain, wondering if Kylo is going to strike out, but Kylo keeps looking at him. Poe hears a soft click of the back door being locked, and Kylo takes Poe’s arm and leads him to the back room. There’s no one there, and Poe is thinking that he’s in for it now, but then Kylo - Ben says, “Whatever you’re doing, you need to stop.”

Poe goes for the old standby, “I don’t know what you’re talking about,”

Kylo’s face is unmoving. He says, “You’re looking into me. Word gets around. And the last thing I need is a cop on my ass.”

Poe blurts out, “Okay, what about on your cock?” and feels mortified. He’s a cop, a cop dealing with a mafia man, and all he can think about now is getting on his knees.

Kylo is looking at him like this is the craziest thing he’s heard, and then looks weirdly uncomfortable. He ducks his head down and clears his throat.

“God, sorry, that was uncalled for, I mean… yeah,” Poe says. 

Kylo shakes his head. “Stop what you’re doing, okay?” 

He looks right into Poe’s eyes. Poe nods. “Okay.”

Poe feels like this is a goodbye forever, like he’ll never see more than a glimpse of Ben, and all he has now are bruises from Kylo. 

Kylo turns to leave, his shoulders wide in his black coat. He stops for a second then looks back. “You checked my phone?” he asks.

“Yeah, of course.”

Kylo nods. “Check it again,” he says, then leaves. 

Poe lays down five dollars then grabs the coffee to head home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If Leia can't kill Jabba, then Kylo will. The apple really doesn't fall far from the tree.
> 
> Come say hi on Tumblr! [wingedbears](http://www.wingedbears.tumblr.com)


	7. Chapter 7

The frustrating part is that there’s nothing new on the phone, nothing saved or hidden on the cloud, just the notes and the photos and the apps. Poe figures Candy Crush isn’t going to get him anywhere, so he looks through the notes. Something has to be here, if Kylo told him to look again. 

Just separate notes that are long strings of letters smashed together. 

Poe would think it’s just key smashing, but Kylo told him to look again.

Poe carefully copies down the letters, one after another. There are five, including the extension number to the Captain’s office.

Poe gets on his laptop, hoping against hope that he can learn something about ciphers and codes so he can crack this open.

But there are so many different types of ciphers, and Poe doesn’t know where to start. He has to go back to the phone.

The notes don’t magically rearrange themselves, no matter how hard Poe glares at them, so he looks at the rest of the phone. The usual apps put there by Apple that no one uses. He goes through them all, and finds this under music: "The Next Episode" by Dr. Dre and Snoop Dogg and "Fuck Tha Police" by N.W.A.

Which strikes Poe as simultaneously hilarious and strange. He tries to imagine Kylo with earbuds in listening to West Coast hip hop and walking down the street. He can’t. Poe listens to both tracks, notes mentally that "The Next Episode" mentions mobbing. Maybe what drew Kylo in was the mentions of his own lifestyle. 

There’s nothing under videos, health, or podcasts.

But there are photos.

One is a dog, a pit bull mix from the look of it. It’s gray, and a treat is laid on its nose. The dog is desperately looking at the picture taker waiting for it’s cue. The space behind it is mostly blank, wooden floor, a pair of legs. 

Another picture, same dog, this time outside. It’s in a park (Poe suspects this is Prospect Park) and the dog smiles its tongue lolling out of its mouth. There’s a swath of grass behind the dog, and a single public restroom. 

Poe keeps swiping, hoping to find some clue. There’s a few sunsets, and last but certainly not least, an off kilter and blurred picture of an alley, and then a hand resting on the pavement. Poe’s hand. Which meant this was the alley was the one that Kylo knocked him out in, the one where Kylo dropped his phone. 

The only contact is Poe’s own number.

Okay. Poe doesn’t know if he can work with this, but it’s what he has. 

Poe looks back at what he has. Two songs, thirteen pictures, and Poe’s number.

Poe looks back at his list of ciphers. It would take too long to input all the possible combinations, the shift ciphers, the classical sets. He would need a number, and Kylo wasn’t thoughtful enough to spell it out for him. 

Poe wonders for a second if he’s going crazy, and seeing things that aren’t there. He doesn’t feel like he’s that far off from pasting shit to the wall and connecting it all with string, but it’s hard to step back from this. Kylo told him to look again. That has to mean there’s something there.

He has thirteen pictures, so he tries the rot13 cipher. It’s a shift cipher, the alphabet moved down thirteen spaces. Unfortunately, the outcome is more jumbled than before. 

Poe crosses that one off. 

Caesar, Porta, the list goes on, but Poe is one down at least.

He tries to see what’s the most common feature on the phone.

"The Next Episode" by Dr. Dre and Snoop Dogg. "Fuck Tha Police". Four pictures of a dog, mostly in the park. Sunsets, and Poe.

He’s running his hand through his hair in frustration. BB-8, at his feet heaves a sigh.

Poe reaches down and pets her, scratching behind it’s ears. “I know,” Poe says. “Good dog.”

Wait. Dog. Snoop Dogg, the pictures. There has to be something there. He looks at the pictures of the dog again. The gray pit bull waiting for a treat, in the park. Poe looks for anything to stand out. The picture seems pretty regular, but then Poe tries to place himself there. Dog in a park, public restroom-- oh God. 

Porta potty is a public restroom. Porta cipher. Thirteen pictures, a thirteen alphabet, not a shift.

Poe holds his breath. Okay all he needs is a code to crack this open. What’s left, Poe thinks. He tries sunset, but that doesn’t work. Almost hesitantly, Poe puts his name into the cipher. “'Fuck Tha Police', right?” he asks awkwardly. 

“LUKE SKYWALKER SAFE,” the first one reads.  
Poe leans back. How would Kylo know that Luke was safe, if he didn’t know where Luke was. Poe cracks the other phrases. 

“LEIA ORGANA SAFE.” Poe pauses. Kylo is looking into his family. Kylo is concerned. Kylo - _Ben_ \- wants to know that his family is safe. Enough to write it down on a burner phone. Leia was right, it was risky to put this stuff down. There are two more messages.

“HAN SOLO UNSAFE.” Okay, Poe thinks, that was something. Ben was sure that Han was unsafe, and if Ben thinks that, then Poe needs to overstep his bounds again. One more time, Poe puts his name into the cipher.

“HAN SOLO WILL DIE.”

This is enough for Poe to get up and grab his jacket. It might be 10 at night, but he needs to get to Han Solo. And that means a road trip.

Occasionally Han Solo will show up at important police functions, hanging out on the outer edges, but other than that, he’s not truly tethered to anything. Rumors used to be rife at the precinct, that he was a drug smuggler, or something of that nature, but he’s really just a pilot that works for a private company. At one of those functions Poe and Finn were talking to Han about it, and Han just leaned in with a smirk and said, “Non disclosure agreement,” and that was the end of that. 

And you won’t see Han without his so very, very tall friend, who everyone calls Chewie. Whether that’s his actual name or not, no one can tell because Chewie is simply un- understandable. Poe thinks he speaks Portuguese, but his accent is so mangled that no one but Han understands what he’s saying. Chewie usually makes his feelings pretty clear, so misunderstandings with the guy are few and far between.

 

He finds Han in the small airport of the Kessel Company, his plane the Millennium Falcon parked out on the field. 

The airfield is quiet. Poe walks into the airport office, no one being at the front desk. Poe sees a pair of boots propped up on the arm of a couch, and Chewie’s large back. Poe knocks on the open door.

Han is on the couch asleep, but rouses when Chewie yells at him. 

“What do you want, kid?” Han asks groggily, squinting. “Hey, you work for Leia, don’t you.”

“She’s my CO, yes,” Poe says. Poe feels himself stand a little straighter.

Han waves a hand. “Whatever it is can wait til I’m done with my nap. I’m old now,” he says this with an air of smugness “So I can do whatever I want.” 

Han is closing his eyes, Chewie giving out an amused chuckle, when Poe says, “It’s about Ben, actually.”

Han’s whole body stiffens, even though his eyes are still closed. The swagger is gone out of him, and Poe can tell that he’s in dad mode now. Han sits up, glaring at Poe. “What about Ben?” he asks. 

“Uh, this is hard to explain,” Poe says, shifting on his feet. Chewie stands up, and crosses his arms. He looms, actually looms, over Poe.

“Well make it happen, kid.”

And it turns out it isn’t so hard to explain as it is embarrassing. Poe sounds like he can’t handle himself, but it’s been a weird time in his life, what with having a boner for a mob guy.

“Wait,” Han is saying. “You’re telling me that my son,” he points to himself. He sounds incredulous. “Told you that I was going to die?” Han rolls his eyes. “The kid was always dramatic. How do I even know that you’re telling the truth here?”

Poe shows him the phone. Tells him about the ciphers. 

Han is swiping through the phone. He sighs. “Seems right up his alley,” Han says. 

Chewie says something after a long silence. 

“Yeah,” Han sighs. “Looks like we’re headed back to the city, Chewie.” Han looks at Poe. “Leia can help.” This seems like a bitter pill for Han to swallow.

Poe knows that Han and Leia support each other, otherwise why would Han even show up to the Captain’s commendation ceremony? Or to any other event, when it is so clearly out of his way? 

 

They all fly back together in the Millennium Falcon, the sun just cresting over the horizon, and park in some airfield Poe’s never even knew about. The trip was smooth for the most part, except the awkward silence. Poe didn’t sleep at all, trying to come up with a plan for Han’s safety.

Poe calls for an escort from the precinct, and they drive to Leia’s. Poe thanks the beat cop and bangs on the roof for the car to set off, leaving the trio to stand at Leia’s stoop in silence. Chewie rolls his eyes and sighs loudly before reaching over for the buzzer. 

A groggy voice answers, “It’s five o’clock in the goddamn morning. This better be important.”

“Hey Leia,” Han says, and there’s no reply. 

A few excruciating moments later Leia opens the door, clasping the robe she wears over her body. She sees the three men before her, and growls out, “Get in.”

Poe feels strangely proud to have witnessed and survived this moment; Captain in the early morning. 

Han already has his hands up, ready to explain, when Poe opens his mouth. “Ben thinks Han is in trouble, Ma’am.” He hopes the respect in his voice will help Leia forgive him. Forgive Poe for stepping over that line again, for putting himself in the middle of family business.

Leia pauses. She clears her throat. “The notes on his phone?” she asks. 

Poe nods.

“Well,” she says, “You boys might as well have some coffee.” She moves further into the house without checking on them.

Chewie follows, coffee being a number one priority with him. 

Han looks at Poe, shrugs, and walks after Chewie. 

Leia is prepping the coffee, when Poe finally walks in. 

“Well, this is…unexpected,” Leia says, glaring at Poe, because she knows exactly what went down. Poe wonders if her commanding presence, good work, or all seeing eyes got her to her position, but he thinks it just might be all three.

They talk it over while the coffee brews, and agree that Han needs to get to a safe house. Han, naturally, is not in favor of this development. “Why can’t I stay here?” he asks. Poe would say he’s whining, but feels magnanimous at the moment. He’s finally got his cup of coffee. He waits for the caffeine to kick in.

“I can’t cover you twenty-four seven, Han,” Leia says, “And Chewie can’t either.” She puts her hand up to stop that line of thinking. “The two of you are not having a shoot out in my house.”

Han crosses his arms; makes a face. 

“It really is for the best,” Poe adds. “And Finn and Rey and I can give you the protection you need.”

“Oh?” Han asks, turning to Poe. “This coming from the detective that had the shit beaten out of him by-”

Chewie yells over Han. Leia glares.

Han looks chastened but still angry. “I don’t like it.”

“We’re well aware,” Leia grits out. “Detective Dameron is one my finest. You should be so lucky.”

“Okay,” Han says, leaning back against the kitchen counter. “But is this really kosher? I’m not really in the witness protection program.”

“You’re now part of an ongoing case,” Leia says. 

Oh god, Poe thinks, that means-

“And that means that until Detective Dameron and his team can solve this, you are under watch.”

Leia smirks, taking a drink of her coffee.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for your kudos and comments! I feel warm and fuzzy when I see them.


	8. Chapter 8

Han is completely useless when it comes to waiting. Poe thinks he should have seen this coming. Han is an action kind of guy, so when Poe tells Han and Chewie (who refused to be in a separate room - at least that’s what Poe thought he said) to stay in the hotel, Han gets kinda antsy. There’s not a lot to do in the safe house, and oddly enough, cable always manages to have the worst stuff on.

Chewie seems okay for the most part, he brought instant coffee, and putters around in the fluffy hotel robe, long legs sticking out. Han, however, immediately opens a can of macadamia nuts in defiance, won’t stop flipping channels, and constantly bugs Finn and the other officers to him go get ice. What he’ll use it for he won’t say, but they all know it’s a thinly veiled attempt to leave the premises.

Finn and Chewie have taken to playing gin rummy. Poker is banned after Finn won, and Chewie got unreasonably upset. “He’ll pull your arms out of your sockets,” Han says smugly.

Meanwhile Poe is on the hunt for Kylo. He needs to know the rest of the details, who and why someone would kill Han. Poe figures that the best way is to got to the source - Kylo Ren is sure to know.

Poe first tries the safest way- which he knows is hopeless- he texts the number in his phone that Ben had, knowing that it will only go straight to the burner. He’s right. The phone buzzes with his own text.

He decides to rifle through the evidence locker. He pulls out all the cases connected to this one, and rifles through. He finds Oola’s and Salacious’s old cells, and thumbs through the contacts there. And while neither of them have Kylo listed, Salacious Crumb comes through with a number under ‘drug lady’. Poe crafts a message:

//looking for some deathsticks got any?

He sets the phone down and considers looking through Elan’s evidence, the drug seller that got Poe into all this mess, for anything that will lead to Ben when his phone buzzes.

//2904 14E LES. 9pm

Well, Poe thinks, at least he’ll have some drugs to get him through this.

Poe leaves Rey with Han and Chewie (for whatever reason they all get along famously) and grabs Finn for the meetup.

Finn has such an apple-pie face that’s hard to refuse. Poe thinks that feature, combined with his unnatural skill of gaining people’s trust is why Finn is so good at pulling out confessions from perps. He’s using Finn here, in the hopes that between Poe and Finn, they’ll get out of this alright.

Poe parks the car, and turns to Finn. The leather seats creak. “Okay, follow my lead.”

“Sure, what’s my story, the kid who’s selling drugs for college?” Finn pulls a wan smile.

Poe looks at Finn, his tie and jacket combo, the biker boots Rey talked him into. “No, you look like a cop. They probably already know I’m a cop.”

“You’re wearing a leather jacket and tie. You can’t talk to me about looking like a cop.”

“Ugh, fine. Here, take off your tie,” Poe says, taking off his jacket and tossing it to Finn. “Here’s the plan, you walk out and talk to the person, try to draw them out. I’ll be your backup.” Poe rolls up his sleeves and musses up his hair a little, loosens his tie. “Okay, better,” he says.

Finn looks at him and scoffs. “Unbelievable,” he mutters.

“What?” Poe asks.

“Your hair-” Finn starts. “Nothing, c'mon let's go.”

Poe expects Phasma to be there, maybe even that small hostess, but when they show up in the impound lot, there’s no one.

Finn steps out into the light, and waits, Poe hiding behind a car.

Which is when Kylo steps out from behind a Monte Carlo. He nods at Finn and flicks away a cigarette he’d been working on. The asshole can’t refuse an opportunity to be dramatic, Poe thinks.

But still, Poe feels himself holding his breath, his skin warming up.

“You the new drug supplier?” Finn asks.

Kylo shrugs. “Phasma’s busy at Werkstatt,” he explains. “You want the drugs, or should I hand them off to your partner?” he asks, smirking and stuffing his hands in his jacket pockets.

“Shit,” Poe says, looking behind him. Kylo knows. Poe doesn’t know how he knows, but Finn’s cover is blown. Lucky for them, it looks like Kylo didn’t bring any backup. Then again, Poe thinks, a man like Kylo doesn’t need backup.

“Oh come on, man,” Finn says.

Poe walks up and lays a hand on Finn, calming him down. Kylo looks at them, amused.

“You two make a cute couple,” Kylo says.

“We’re not dating,” Poe says calmly. “You know why I’m here.”

Kylo walks forward.

Poe turns to Finn. “It’s okay,” Poe says, “stay here.”

Finn frowns, but crosses his arms and nods.

Poe steps forward to meet Kylo, taking a steadying breath. Kylo smells of leather and tobacco and something deeply spicy that Poe can’t quite name. Poe can’t stop watching Kylo’s face, his soft eyes, the strong nose.

“He’s safe,” Poe says, not knowing where else to start.

Kylo closes his eyes, nods. “Good.”

“You know that I’m trusting you here,” Poe says.

“I know,” Kylo says.

“Not even a thank you?” Poe’s only a little offended.

Kylo gives a soft smile. “Thank you,” he says, leaning in and pausing right before pressing full lips at the corner of Poe’s mouth. Poe turns his head towards Kylo and brushes their lips together, releasing a sigh as Kylo stops. But then Kylo draws his hand up to Poe’s neck, rubbing his thumb along Poe’s jawline.

Poe is about to press in closer, to try to access that sweet mouth when the clearing of a throat - Finn - reaches his ears.

Poe turns to look at Finn, still gripping Kylo’s jacket tight, and sees Finn with his arms up in the air, the signal for “what the hell is going on?” Finn looks completely baffled.

Oh, right.

Okay, maybe Poe needs to think about where this is headed (nowhere but disaster, his conscious kicks in) and lets go of Kylo.

Poe sneaks a look at Kylo. He’s staring at Poe intently, solemn.

Poe feels his face warm up, and steps back.

Kylo doesn’t move, and continues to watch Poe’s mouth.

Poe clears his throat. “Can you give me any information on who’s after Solo?”

“Snoke,” Kylo says, his voice deep, rough.

“Why, what does Snoke have against him?”

Kylo runs a hand through his hair, bites his lip. “Me. Snoke wants me to kill him.”

“Why?” Poe asks.

“He thinks that Solo is my last link to my family. He wants me to go through them, one by one.”

“So Luke…”

Kylo shakes his head. “Snoke wants Luke dead for the rise of the First Order. Bring in the parishioners, so to speak. It’s just a sweet bonus that we’re related.”

“So once you’re done -”

“Snoke wants me to have one family.” Kylo draws his brows together. “He’s convinced that once I’m done, I won’t have any moral quagmires and he can have me kill others of,” Kylo pauses, “higher influence.”

“So he wants an assassin?” Poe asks.

Kylo shrugs. “That’s one way to put it.”

He’s using you, Kylo,” Poe says, reaching out, but not touching.

Kylo looks at the outstretched hand. Steps back. “The point-” he says, a hint of anger coming through “-is that Solo is safe. Snoke will keep upping the ante. He wants New York, not just Brooklyn.”

“Yeah, kinda gathered that,” Poe says.

“I have to go,” Kylo says.

“Right. I’ll just come up with a plan to take Snoke down on my own,” Poe bites out.

Kylo glares. “I’m doing the best I can,” he says. He waves a hand between them, indicating them both. “Even this shit is risky.”

Poe sighs, leans his head back. “Right. Right, okay. I’ll figure it out.” He rubs a hand over his face and looks at Kylo. “Anything else you’d like to share?”

Kylo stares at him, haggard looking. “Hurry,” he says, and turns to walk off.

“What? That’s it?” Poe yells.

Kylo spins around, still walking away, and lifts his arms up in a shrug.

“You’re an asshole,” Poe tells him.

Kylo grins, and turns back around, disappearing behind a Thunderbird.

Poe hates himself for thinking that Kylo’s smile is cute.

 

Finn, surprisingly, doesn’t say anything until they reach the car again. Poe is buckling up when Finn says, “You want to tell me why you’re macking on a hit man for the mob?”

“Oh my God,” Poe moans, hitting his head against the top of the steering wheel. “First, no one says macking on anymore-”

“ _That’s_ what you want to start with?”

“Second,” Poe continues loudly, “I’m just as surprised as you are, okay?” He turns his head slightly on the wheel, sees Finn from the corner of his eye. “I didn’t expect this to happen. The more I dug into this case, the more I got to know him, and-”

“Is this another one of your strays, Poe? You know that never ends well.”

“No!” Poe sighs, for what feels like the hundredth time that night. He sits back upright in his seat. “I really think he’s trying, okay?”

“This is such a bad idea,” Finn moans.

“I know,” Poe says. Finn really doesn’t have to tell him that all of this is a bad idea, from digging through a case left well enough alone, to starting to have feelings for a mob hit man. He’s really going off road, here, and doesn’t know where the trail picks up again. All he can really attest to about Kylo is that he gave Poe clues to save his father, and that the last two times they met, Kylo didn’t beat him up. This is not a great start.

They sit in silence for a bit. Finn looks incredibly worried, and Poe feels bad for making Finn so upset.

“Besides,” Poe says after awhile. “You were one of my strays.” He hits Finn in the arm lightly.

Finn laughs and rolls his eyes. “Just drive, you mook,” Finn says.

“Who are you?” Poe asks, “Where do you get these words?”

“Just drive!”

 

Poe drops Finn off at the precinct, and goes to switch off with Rey at the safe house for the midnight shift. Poe feels like he hasn’t slept in ages, but just four hours a night for a couple of days will do that.

When he gets there, he notices an extra police car there, something not out of the car pool, but an actual black and white. They shouldn’t be here. Which means something is wrong.

Poe dashes out and runs up the two flights, foregoing the elevator in his rush.

He slides to a stop in front of the wide open door, to see Rey looking majorly pissed off, and a uniform looking like they might die from the heat of Rey’s glare.

“What happened?” Poe asks, breathless. “What-”

“We’ve been compromised,” she says. “Han and Chewie had to be moved.”

Poe opens his mouth to ask where the fuck they are, when Rey continues, “The Captain’s with them at the station, there’s nothing to worry about.”

“Oh thank fuck,” Poe says.

Rey walks up to him. “We’ll go and see them, okay? Just give me a couple of minutes here.” She walks off to talk to a beat cop.

Poe nods and leans up against the wall to catch his breath. He’s not used to this. Sure, he’s used to cases having the usual emotional ups and downs; the high of the chase, the low of having to tell a family what’s happened to a loved one. Poe knows that, he does. What’s so unusual is that this time Poe’s too caught up in the case. He’s so caught up he it’s unhealthy - he realizes that, he does - but he can’t back down now. It’s simply not in him. A better detective would call out; too tied up emotionally. But Poe desperately wants this case finished.

What is it, he wonders, is it that it’s Leia Organa’s family? This is the woman that’s his boss, mentor, and someone he’s looked up to since he can remember.

Is it that Poe was so severely beaten up that he’s so invested? Revenge? Or that Kylo Ren, is reaching out to him, Poe Dameron, for help. In a way, Finn is right. Poe never could refuse a stray. And, yes with his past boyfriends and girlfriends under that category the relationship always fell apart. Poe thought for a while that maybe it was because they didn’t need saving anymore. That maybe he had a savior complex.

But sometimes, the strays in his life turn out to be the best thing that ever happened to him. Finn, Rey, BB8 - all of them Poe has taken in at one point or another. And it’s that part of him, the part that sees Rey smile, or Finn laugh freely, that part wants that for Kylo.

Poe is thinking he might be truly fucked over, without any of the fun parts, when Rey comes up to him again. “Come on,” she says. “I’ll take you there.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fucking finally, am I right? Geeze, boys. Alright my lovely readers, take a breather, and go listen to the [soundtrack ](http://wingedbears.tumblr.com/post/139935982353/a-soundtrack-to-missing-the-mark-a-darkpilot) I made.
> 
> I love every kudos and comment. Thank you. If I could give you a hug for 10 minutes, I would. But only if you're into that.


	9. Chapter 9

“We have to find them a new safe house,” Poe says.

“Dameron, we're handling it,” Captain says. “Sit down.”  Poe slumps into the leather couch in the office.

“We have that one place out on 43rd,” Leia says,  “We’ll do that and then we'll send detectives Rey and Finn out for-”

“We need to move them now,” Poe says, head in hands.  He feels like taking a nap, for maybe the rest of time.

“We'll get to that,” Leia is firm.  “The longer we keep Han and Chewie out of the way, the longer we have to bring Snoke down. What we need to do is find out who is working for Snoke.”

“Or who would sell us out,”  Rey says.

“Not anybody on our crew,” Finn says, “I know this squad.”

“Look, I have to call Internal Affairs,”  Leia says.

Poe, Finn, and Rey groan.

“I can’t stand them either,” Leia says, “but putting the squad under an investigation will actually save our asses, and makes us look clean.”

“And sadistic,” Rey says.

“That may be,” Leia says, grinning.  “But we can drop the mole on IA, and focus on Snoke.”

There’s a knock on the office door.  Finn waits for Leia to nod before opening it.  It’s Han and Chewie.  “Well, the station’s boring as usual, right Chewie?” Han asks, duffel bag slung on his shoulder.  His henley is fully buttoned, for once, and his jacket zipped up.  Chewie rolls his eyes and huffs.  Han doesn’t pay attention.  “Are we ready to roll, or do we need to bring it through the committee?”

Leia looks amused and warm.  

Poe forgot how weird their flirting could get.  

“This is not a committee,” she says finally, and then, “Detective Dameron will take you out to the next safe house.”

 

Poe has Han and Chewie set up in the new safe house when there’s a knock on the door.  Poe motions for them to stick behind him, and then the door is kicked in.  It’s Kylo and Hux and a couple of thugs.  

“Well, if it isn’t Han Solo,” Hux says.  The thugs move in, and Poe aims his gun on Hux.  The two look back at Kylo and Hux, waiting.  Poe, despite his weapon, doesn’t feel like the one in control.

“You were expecting someone else?” Han asks, hands up in the air.  

“NYPD, put your hands behind your head,” Poe says, but he might as well be shouting into the void, because no one pays any attention to him.  Poe growls, jams his gun into his shoulder holster, and swings a punch at one of the lackeys.  The blow lands on the guy’s throat, and he’s out, wheezing and trying to get his breath back.  

Poe doesn’t like fighting.  But that doesn’t mean he’s not good at it.  

He turns his attention to the next guy who’s already mid punch, and Poe gets socked in the jaw, his head flinging back, but then he hears a yell, and Chewie pulls the guy back, up, and then drops him like a rag doll.  There’s a cracking sound, and Poe winces, and hopes the guy is okay.  He turns to the other guy, and is pulling his gun out of his holster, when he hears Hux sneer, “Enough.”  

The two guys get up slowly.  

“I’ll deal with you two later,” Hux says.  They walk back behind him, ashamed.

Poe is about to tell them to get down again, when Han steps forward.  “Ben,” he says.  Han looks homesick.  “Come home, come back.  With me.”

Kylo’s eyes are wide and sad.  “What makes you think I can?” he asks.  

“Your mother and I miss you. We’ll do whatever it takes, start fresh, whatever you need.”

Kylo is taking ragged breaths.  

Poe still has his gun aimed at Hux, waiting for Kylo to make his move.

Hux says, “Here’s your last test to become his true son, inherit everything.”  And he crosses his arms, sneering, and it’s like Poe isn’t even there.

Kylo shakes his head, and pulls out his gun.  He aims it at Han’s chest.  

It feels like all the air has gone out of the room.  What the hell is Kylo doing?  Why would he even try to save his father, if he knew - Poe pauses.  Kylo knew that this would happen, but he’s going through with it anyway.  

Poe’s whole body goes cold.  

“Please,” Han says, spreading his arms, vulnerable.  

Kylo sighs, says, “I can’t- I need you to help me.”

And Hux laughs, his face in a snarl, but then Han nods.  “It’s okay,” Han says.

Two shots ring out, and Han drops.  

Poe’s ears are ringing, he lowers his gun, Chewie is wailing, starting forward towards Kylo, and Poe can’t believe this is happening.  He raises his gun and aims for Kylo this time.  But Kylo and Hux are already rushing out the door, but Poe gets off one good shot into Hux, hitting his spine.  Hux wheezes out a breath of air, but grabs the door frame.  Poe runs up and handcuffs him and looks up and around, and Kylo is still there.  Kylo isn’t even looking at him, but at Han, his eyes wide.

Poe wants to shoot him still, but does nothing.  Poe is shaking his head, about to shove Hux aside to grab at Kylo, but then Kylo sees something, and all the color rushes back into his face.  He turns and runs.  

“Fuck!” Poe screams, and leaves Hux clutching at the door to reach for his radio.  

“This is Detective Dameron at 43rd and East Coruscant, I need an ambulance immediately,” he snaps.   There’s a response, but Poe is watching Chewie and Han.  Chewie is leaning over Han, and Han is… laughing.  “Son of a bitch,” Han says, winded.

“What the fuck?” Poe yells.

Han lays a hand on his chest.  “They never tell you how much that hurts.”   

Poe rushes over.  “Did you steal-” Poe rips up Han’s shirt, dismissing Han’s cries of protest.  There, underneath the layers is a bulletproof vest.  “ _You stole a kevlar vest_?”  

“Ah,” Han says, “but I’m still here to yell at,” he says and then has the audacity to wink at Poe.  

“God I could punch you,” Poe grits out.

 

The ambulance comes and gets Han, leaving Poe to drive Chewie to the hospital and call Leia about her stupid husband.  

The doctor is talking it over with Leia, and Poe is out in the waiting room with Chewie, regretting his life choices, because how did he not see this coming, he is the world’s worst detective.

It was a setup from the start.  Poe sees that now.

First, Poe is led to look for Luke, and on not finding him, goes back to Kylo on Kylo’s own suggestion.

Second, Kylo leaves a series of clues that lead Poe to believe that Ben Solo thinks his family is in danger, and that Poe can help save Han Solo.

Third, Poe brings Solo back to the city, asks to meet with Phasma, and gets Kylo instead.  How convenient.  Poe then tells Kylo that Han is in a safe house, one which is almost immediately thereafter compromised by a mole.

Fourth, and most humiliating, Kylo throws Poe off by initiating a kiss, thereby manipulating him emotionally, and tells him to look to Hux.  Poe is an idiot.

Leia comes up and sits next to him, puts a hand on his back.

Poe starts apologizing, but doesn’t know where to start; he’s failed so miserably.

“Poe, listen,” she says, firm but kind.  “Ben was a sniper in the army.”

“What?” Poe asks, not knowing where this is headed.

“He doesn’t miss,” Leia says.  “Han had two shots to the chest, one near the shoulder, and one under the ribs.”

“That doesn’t-” Poe thinks that she’s saying this because she’s Kylo’s mother.

“He used full metal jackets.”

Poe stops.  Cheap bullets, bullets that didn’t expand on impact, bullets used in the army.  Bullets that went straight through a person without stopping - that’s why the vest was pierced.  

“He went as close as he could to the heart without killing.  Had Han not been wearing a vest, he would be okay.  In a lot more pain, and needing a hell of a lot of surgery, but okay.”

And Poe’s seen it before, even once some kid six times to the chest and lived.  Chest wounds can be fatal, given the right circumstances.  But the only way to for sure kill someone with a gun is a shot to the head.

“No offense, but I can’t believe that right now,” Poe says.  “I’m sorry,” he says for what feels like the millionth time, but not nearly enough.

Leia’s mouth straightens into a flat line.  “Take the rest of the day off,” she says.  Poe protests, but she won’t back down.  “Captain’s orders.”

 

 

The next day is not much better, at least in terms of work.  Poe walks in with his tail between his legs.  It doesn’t help that Rey and Finn keep shooting each other worried looks when they think Poe isn’t looking.  

Poe is in the middle of moping into his coffee when Leia calls him into her office.  

“How’s Hux?” Poe asks, standing in the doorway, not knowing what else to say.

Leia sighs.  “Still alive,” she says, “We’ll have to do so much paperwork.”

Poe nods, afraid to bring up Kylo.  Afraid to say that Leia still believes that Kylo is good, but Poe doesn’t.

He hates this, hates that he clearly has feelings for his commanding officer’s son, who is in the mafia.

“Well,” Poe says, knocking on the door frame.  “Better get back to it.”

“Dameron,” Leia says.  Her voice brooks no argument.  He turns and faces her.  “Close the door,” she says.

Okay, Poe thinks, we’re doing this.

“Yes, Captain,” he says, following orders.

“Have a seat,” Leia says, gesturing to the chairs in front of her desk.  

Poe does.

“I know what you’re thinking,” she says, “that I’m crazy, that I can only believe the best of Ben because he is my son.”

Poe’s silence is damning.

“Well, you’re right.”

Poe’s eyes widen.  

“Ben is my son, and I can only believe the best in him.  I know he’s done terrible things, but I know my son, I know that there’s still good in him.”

Poe closes his eyes, sighs, almost physically pained at this.  “I just can’t believe that,” he says.  “Maybe a day or two ago I’d be with you, but not now.”

“I understand.  Regardless, I’m still going to ask you to work on this case.”

He clenches his teeth.   _Seriously?_

“You’re one of my best detectives, and having you on this case is the best hope we have to solve this thing.  Use the squad when you need to, pool resources.”

“Yes Ma’am,” Poe says lowly.

“The other thing I brought you in here for,” Leia says before Poe can trudge back out to the bullpen, “Is that for bringing down Hux, you’re getting a commendation.”

Poe sits up.  “What?”

“The mayor is hosting it, it’s a very big deal.”

“Mayor Thrawn?”  Poe makes a face.

“I’m not a fan either,” Leia says.  “But he’s trying to boost his image after all this noise about mafia business.  Giving you a commendation for community service shows that he’s on the city’s side.”

Poe groans, leans his head into his hands. “And I’m guessing I can’t say no.”

“Nope,”  Leia says, cheerful.  “Get used to being praised for good deeds, Dameron.”  She clasps her hands together.  “Now get out of my office, and get back to work.”

Poe thinks that it may have been the longest work day of his life.  It dragged on, and the piles of paperwork he had to slough through didn’t provide him with any fresh new connections on the case.  Worse yet, the Internal Affairs lady shows up.  

Poe thinks that in another lifetime they would’ve gotten along.  As it is, she kicks Leia out of her office, and calls in Poe first thing.

“Sit down!” she yells joyously.  

“I’m Maz,” she says, adjusting her bottle coke glasses.  Her eyes are huge. She heaves herself into Leia’s chair.  “You may call me Agent Maz,” she offers.

“Um, thank you.”

“I just have a few questions,” she starts, and Poe finds himself telling her all the details of the case so far, rolling names and places off his tongue.  He finds himself being quiet when it comes to Kylo.  Maybe admitting to canoodling with the enemy wouldn’t be the best idea.

“Going off the books, I see,” she says.  She sounds weirdly pleased.

“Not on the precinct’s time,” he repeats.  “And I’ve never taken files home.”

“No, no, of course not.”  She looks up at him with those magnified eyes.   There’s a long silence. “You seem to be a straight fellow,” she finally says.  

Poe releases a breath he didn’t know he was holding.  He looks down at the files that Maz has open on the desk.  There’s a list of names, detectives in the squad, and weirdly enough, the IT guys.   

After concluding business with Maz he heads back to his desk, and does some filing.  After Finn, then Rey, gets called into the office, Poe makes his way back down to the IT department.

He does his best to get information out of the two, but Threepio keeps saying it’s classified.  While Threepio is vehemently denying that anything of that sort could happen, Poe looks over his head and sees Artoo, who gives him a slow nod.  

Poe pretends to be shooed away by Threepio.

When he comes out of the precinct that night, he spies Artoo on the corner, chewing on a cigar.  “Hey,” Poe says cautiously.

Artoo jerks his head, “Walk with me,” he says.  “IA’s been bugging my ass on this case.  And I’m not one for the rules anyway.”  He looks at Poe.  “What I’m about to tell you, I never said, got it?”  Artoo jabs a finger into Poe’s chest, and Poe wonders if this is what everyone else taller than him experiences when he gets mad.

“Got it,” Poe says.

“It ain’t a mole.  It’s a hacker.  Damn good one to get past mine and Threepio’s walls,”

“What would a hacker want with safe house locations?”

“That’s what I’m telling you,” says Artoo, “something is hinky here.”

“You think maybe it’s the First Order?”

Artoo chews on his cigar for a bit, and spits.  Poe does his best to keep a straight face.

“Maybe,” Artoo finally says.  “Hackers usually leave a symbol, something that marks their work.”

“A signature.”

“Exactly.  This one?  Nada.”

Poe thinks about it.  If a hacker for the First Order used safe house locations to find Han Solo, then sent goons out to each one, why not go ahead and take Han then?  Did Hux want to wait for Kylo to come and shoot Han?  Artoo was right, it wasn’t adding up.

“Thanks, Artoo,” Poe says.

“Don’t thank me, I didn’t tell you.”

“Right.”  Poe holds in a laugh.

Poe gets in his car to drive home and think over this new information.  Why would a hacker get into police files like that?  And if they were going after Han Solo, why not just kill him at the first safe house?  Why have him driven back to the police station and then to the next location?

He gets home, and hears BB8 yapping.  “I’m coming, baby, hang on,” he says, jiggling his key in the lock.  He shoulders the door open, and hears the skittering of BB8’s little paws.

“Hey buddy!”  Poe says, kneeling down. “Wait,” he says, as he’s petting the dog, “how did you get out of your cage?”

Poe looks up, and there in his loft studio, is Kylo Ren.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was so hard to write, y'all. An insane amount of research on chest wounds, all for naught.
> 
> But I can promise you some good Kylo and Poe interaction in the next chapter. 
> 
> Also, THANK YOU ALL for the kind comments and all the kudos! When I get them, I blush a little.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kylo implies that he has PTSD. If this is in any way triggering, please don't read!

Poe honestly doesn’t know what to do first, punch out Kylo’s lights, or call dispatch.  He’s shaking, he’s so full of anger.

“What the hell are you doing here?” he asks.  He walks up to Kylo, demanding an answer.  “How did you even get in?”

Kylo slides a glance towards the window.

Poe sighs.  “Okay, fine.  You broke into my apartment.  Want to tell me why while I call dispatch about this?”

“Sorry about your apartment,” Kylo finally says while Poe is digging in his jeans for a phone.  “But don’t call the police.”

“Seriously?  You want me to not call the police after all the shit you pulled.”  Even as he says this, he pauses after he has the phone in his palm.  “Un-fucking-believable,” Poe says, but he’s not sure whether he’s addressing himself or Kylo.

“Snoke pushed me, told me I couldn’t be a part of this anymore unless I acted like his son, and not Han Solo’s.”

“Why did you even want to be a part of this anymore?  You clearly don’t want to be, but you keep pulling this shit with me, like shooting your dad.”

While Poe is saying this, BB8 is whining, walking back and forth between the two of them.  Poe notices that Kylo is holding one of BB’s toys loosely.

“I have to walk my dog,” Poe says.  “You can get out.”

“Han’s okay, though,” Kylo says.  “He was wearing a vest.”

“That’s not the point,” Poe says.  He walks over to the front closet and pulls open the door to grab BB8’s harness and leash.

“I took a calculated risk,” Kylo says, low and angry.

“No,” Poe says, turning to him.  “No, you don’t get to be angry.  I’m angry, not you.”  He calls BB8 over with a click of his mouth, and put the harness and leash on her, careful not to tug too hard.  Just because he’s angry is no reason to be a dick to his dog.

Kylo closes his eyes and sighs.  He walks over to where Poe is opening the door.  He jams his hands in his jacket, and waits for Poe to open the door.

“I took a calculated risk,” Kylo repeats himself.  It sounds like this is something he’s been telling himself to feel better about shooting his own father.

“Yeah,” Poe says, “about that.” He waits for Kylo to walk out and he and BB8 follow, and Poe locks the door.  His grip on the leash is tight, but BB8 is well trained enough to not yank.  “You shot your dad, and then ran out. How is that a calculated risk?”  He pauses, starting down the stairs.  “You can leave now.  Use the elevator, or something.”

Kylo doesn’t pay attention, and continues to follow him all the way down the stairs and out the building.  Poe is trying to keep a fast pace, but Kylo has those damn long legs going for him, so no matter how Poe speeds up, Kylo is next to him.

“I used the First Order’s hacker,” Kylo says finally.

Poe has to slow down, because BB8 is pulling to smell around the fences and stoops.  Poe sighs.  “What?” he asks.  He can’t believe that he’s allowing Kylo to explain himself, allowing Kylo to stick around.

“The First Order has a hacker on call,” Kylo says.  “I had her look into the police files for safe houses.”

“Yeah, we figured that out,” Poe says.

“I had someone go and roost Han out of the first house.”

Poe bites on his next answer, wondering why because this has been bugging him.

“It’s procedure to have the person taken back to the station, before going out to the next house.” Kylo pauses.  “I know my dad.  If he knows that he’s going to be killed, there’s no way he’s going to sit around and wait for that to happen.”

“So you were banking on Han stealing a vest from the station.”

Kylo shrugs.  “I used cheaper bullets, hoping that even if he wasn’t wearing the vest, he’d at least have a chance with you there.”

Poe wants to scream.  The thought that Kylo would break Poe’s trust while still explicitly trusting that Poe would help is maddening.

“So you just hoped things would work out for the best.”

“Poe,” Kylo says, low.  Poe thinks that this might be the first time that Kylo’s called him by that name, and he wants to hear it again, no matter how mad he is.  “I’m trying my best here.  I need your help.”

Poe is torn.  There’s a lot of things that he wants to say.  First is that Kylo has no right to try to depend on Poe. Second, is that Poe shouldn’t be falling for this.

“With what?” Poe finally spits out.

“I need to take Snoke down.”

“Yeah, we went over that.  Look, I-” Poe stops.  I want to believe you, he thinks.  Can’t believe you.  Can’t trust you.  Poe sighs.  “I need some time.”

“And I’d love to give that to you, but I don’t have any.”

BB8 yips.  Poe feels himself deflate.  He sees his usual bar across the way, heat lamps out on the deck.  

“Beer?” Poe asks, gesturing to the bar.  Maybe Poe will calm down with a cold one in him.

Kylo follows him.  

They finally get settled, BB8 is at Poe’s feet, curled up, Poe’s beer in hand, and a glass of whiskey in front of Kylo.  Poe gets a flashback of Kylo pouring vodka on his leg, knife embedded in his thigh.  Poe takes a drink, but Kylo doesn’t touch his glass.

“Why are you with them?”  Poe finally asks.

Kylo sighs.  “Long story.”

Poe looks around.  There’s two other people out here on the deck, but they’re huddled next to their own heat lamp, much like Kylo and Poe.  “Long story, not here, long story?  Or long story, don’t want to talk about it, long story?”

“Long story, period.”  He looks at Poe.  

“Well, you’ve got til we finish our drinks, that enough?”

Kylo looks at his untouched glass.  “When I was in the army,” he says, “I - got really messed up.”  He points to his head.  “Lots of stuff going on.  Mom insisted I see a counselor, but I said I was fine.  I wasn’t.

“They discharged me, but where was I supposed to go?  Back home was no good, because I was expected to be the golden child.  But I was so broken already.  I got out, and I started selling drugs.  Easy shit, as long as I kept clean.  Led to this.  Snoke saw me, still saw potential, at least that’s what I thought- so I kept going back to that.

“I thought that I could go back to being the golden child with him. That I could finally be something that somebody wanted.  Something more than Ben Solo.  Ben Solo was broken, but Kylo Ren wasn’t.  Kylo had his shit together.”  Kylo finally takes a drink of that whiskey.  Poe’s never heard him talk so much.

“And now?” Poe asks, “Why now?”

Kylo pauses, drink halfway to his lips.  “That’s a little more complicated.”  

Poe struggles not to lash out.  “It’s like pulling teeth with you,” he says instead.  

Kylo huffs out a laugh.  It doesn’t sound happy, but more surprised than anything.  “I have to stick around, because this has become bigger than just myself.”  He looks at Poe, dark eyes serious.  “If it was just me, I’d go, move to Canada or some shit.  But I’ve got too many ties right now.”

“So you do want out.”

“No, Poe,” Kylo says rolling his eyes.  “I love being with these guys, they really bring out my good side.”

“Don’t get like that with me,” Poe says, reminding himself of his dad.  He takes a deep breath.  “I’m just trying to understand.”

“I know,” Kylo says.  “And I want to explain it to you.  But I seriously can’t.”

“You’re under oath huh?”  Poe says, leaning back.

“Something like that.”  He pauses.  “Hux okay?”

“Still alive, if that’s what you’re wondering.  I’m getting a commendation for shooting him, too.”  Poe takes a drink of beer.  This is almost starting to feel normal.  

“Oh really?”  Kylo sounds almost amused.

Poe nods.  “From the mayor, even.”  He brings up his hands, gesturing out the words : “For exemplary service to the community.”  He smiles and looks to Kylo.  Kylo’s stiff.  “What?”  Poe asks.

“Mayor Thrawn is giving you a commendation?”  Kylo asks.

“Not a fan either, huh?”

Kylo reaches out and clasps Poe’s wrist.  “You know those reasons that I can’t really talk about?”

“Yeah?”

“Mayor Thrawn is part of that.”

  
  
  


Poe tries his best to wait til they’re back in his apartment to explode.  But he gets as far as the rickety elevator.  “Mayor Thrawn is First Order?”

“Be quiet,” Kylo hisses.  “You’ve only had one beer, how can you be this drunk?”

“I’m not drunk, I’m mad.”  Poe waits for the elevator to creak to a stop on his floor, and lets BB8 lead the way out.  “Unbelievable. You,” Poe recognizes he’s just saying sentence fragments, but this is beyond reason.  He shoulders his door open and takes BB8’s leash off, and BB8 runs for her water dish, stopping too fast and sliding into the kitchen cabinets.  

Poe locks the door, and turns to Kylo.  “How can Thrawn be a part of this?”  Kylo opens his mouth, but Poe stops him.  “Classified, right.”  He walks over and slumps on the couch. Kylo stands awkwardly over him, hands jammed into his jacket.

“What am I supposed to do?”

“Well,” Kylo says, sitting down next to Poe.  “I have an idea.”

“As long as it doesn’t involve shooting someone,” Poe says.  He lolls his head to look at Kylo.  Kylo doesn’t look too comfortable, his legs straight out in front of him.  

“I need the precinct’s help, though.”

“What?  No, no way.”

“Think of it this way, I’ll be your man on the inside,” Kylo says.  

“You _were_ my man on the inside, but someone got shot!”

Kylo looks at him, puts his hand down between their bodies.  “You tell my mom that I’ll be your man on the inside.  I’ll help you take down Snoke.”  Poe realizes that Kylo is leaning in.  He leans away.

“Okay, but how can we do that if you won’t actually talk to me about it?”  He puts his hand on Kylo’s shoulder, not pushing, but not pulling him in either.

“I’ll get better at communicating,” Kylo says.  His body is turned towards Poe’s on the couch, his knee prodding into Poe’s thigh.  Poe finds his hand in Ben’s hair, the nape of his neck soft.

“Well you better,” Poe breathes, “You completely suck at it.”

Kylo shakes his head, says, “I’ll work on it.”  Then Kylo leans the rest of the way in and takes Poe’s lips with his own.  

Poe sighs, wrapping his arms around Kylo’s neck, feeling himself lean further back on the couch.  His right hand wanders down Kylo’s hard chest, the stupid jacket in the way.  Poe pulls back to look down at Kylo’s wide shoulders, his own hands slipping into the folds of Kylo’s jacket, tugging back.  Kylo sits up and takes off the jacket, and after a second of thinking, his sweater too.  There’s just a t-shirt now, and Poe wants to see the rest, wants more than just a glimpse of the trail of hair on Kylo’s stomach.  

Kylo leans back in again, and this time lands his mouth on Poe’s neck.  Poe groans; leans his head back and hits his head on the armrest.  There’s a thunk.  Ben stops, whispers, “You okay?”

“Yeah,” Poe says, guiding Ben’s head back down.  Ben goes, sucking a mark on Poe’s neck, stopping to scrape his teeth along the mark he just made.

Poe can’t remember the last time he got a hickey.  And showing up to work is going to be hell, because Captain Organa -  “Wait,” Poe says, pushing a little, his fists wrapped up in Kylo’s shirt.

Kylo’s hands are on Poe’s waist, paused.  He sits up.  Kylo’s lips are full and red, slick from kissing Poe.

Poe sighs, rubs a hand over his face.  This is exactly what happened last time.  He let Kylo manipulate him, let himself be caught up in Kylo, and that’s how Poe failed miserably.  He let himself trust Kylo, and Han could have died.

Poe won’t let that happen again.

“We should talk to the Captain first,” Poe says.

Kylo looks utterly confused.  “What does my mom have to do with us making out?”

Okay, Poe really didn’t explain that well.  “I meant, I can’t-”  He stops. “Look there’s nothing more I want to do than to make out with you.  Really.  You’re hot.”

Kylo’s face softens.

“But I can’t-  I want to -”  Why was this so hard?  “I don’t trust you right now.”

Kylo blinks.  He moves back further on the couch, allowing Poe to get up.  “Is that what you need?”  Kylo asks after a while.

Poe nods, feeling childish.  He should be able to get over this, should be able to have sex without worrying whether he can implicitly trust someone.

“Okay,” Kylo says after a bit.

“Really?”  Poe asks.

“I mean, I really like kissing you, so there’s that, but I think it’s … nice,” Kylo says.  “Normal.”

“Normal.”

“I live a weird lifestyle, Poe,” Kylo says.  He shrugs.  

“I can’t deny that,” Poe says.  He leans in and kisses the corner of Kylo’s mouth.  “Do you need to stay the night?” he asks.

Kylo shakes his head.  “I have to get back.  But I’ll see you tomorrow.”  He gets up, gathers his things and heads to the door.

“Okay,” Poe says, following him.  “Don’t do anything illegal!”  

Kylo shoots him a flat look, then opens the door and leaves.

Poe locks up behind him and wonders exactly what his life has turned into.  

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm just as frustrated as you. God Poe, why are you cock blocking me? 
> 
> And thank you all for your lovely comments and kudos! They bring me such joy, you don't even know.


	11. Chapter 11

Sure enough the next morning after the meeting, Captain Organa waves Poe over. 

“Let’s talk in my office,” she says, and Poe follows her. The blinds are shut, and Poe shuts the door, knowing this has something to do with the case. Something to do with Kylo. 

“I got a call to my office last night,” Leia says. “I don’t think I have to tell you who it was.”

Poe presses his lips together, looks to the side.

“If this is happening,” she says sounding like a mother weighing permission if Poe can stay the night and play, “I want to be aboveboard. No more sneaking around.”

Poe heaves a sigh of relief. “Yes, of course.”

“Now, I’ve set up a stake out for you two,” Leia continues. “There’s a restaurant on 63rd, called Antonio’s. Jabba used to run it as a front.”

“I remember,” Poe says.

“Good. Kylo will be miked and go in. Snoke is going to meet with a lobbyist tonight, and wants to push through some legislation that will keep the government off his back.”

Poe can’t imagine what that would be. Drugs most likely.

“So, you’ll be his eyes on the street, his backup in case anything goes wrong.”

“Alright,” Poe says, although he doesn’t think that Kylo needs any help.

“And Poe?” Leia asks. “Be careful.”

Poe leaves, feeling oddly winded. It all seemed transparent and honest, like Leia said, but at the same time there was something nagging at him, some sense of intuition that told him that something wasn’t right. 

Poe went back to the desk to go over the whole thing one more time. After the fifth heaving sigh, Finn looks up worriedly. “You okay, man?” He asks. 

“Yeah, it’s just this case, something’s not right.”

“The case?” Finn asks with depth. He might as well wink atrociously for all the good he’s doing being subtle.

“Yes,” Poe says flatly. “That case.” Then he gets an idea. “Wait, Finn, are you busy, could you walk this through with me? There’s something I’m not getting, I need fresh eyes,” Poe says, giving his best pleading look.

“Yeah, of course,” Finn says, like he’s not logging up overtime already. 

Poe feels uncomfortable with all the info out, so they go into the interrogation room. He starts off by telling the whole thing, so relieved there’s not anything to hide behind anymore. 

“Wait,” Finn says. “Kylo left you clues?”

“Well it sounds silly when you put it like that,” Poe says, hands on hips.

“No I mean, what clues, that is so awesome.”

Poe describes the ciphers, and the odd one out, Leia’s landline.

“Why would he have a number to Leia?” Finn asks.

Leia said never to tell anyone, but he’s been doing too much under the table, so: “Kylo...is her son,” Poe says, waiting for a reaction. 

Finn is quiet a few minutes, then says, “Okay, but why would he need her number?”

Poe is about to roll his eyes and explain again, thinking that Finn’s brain must have rebooted, when Finn continues, “Think about it,” he says. “If the clues are for you and him, and the Captain’s number is on there for what reason?” He spreads his hands. “It’s his mom, he would know already.”

It was so I would know they’re related.

Finn raises his hand and shakes it, makes a noise of disagreement. “The whole thing could’ve been done without that. But continue.”

Poe frowns, but does. The ciphers: Luke is safe, Leia is safe, Han is not, Han will die.

“Hold up,” Finn says. “How does he know Luke is safe?”

“Well Luke wasn’t there when I went,” Poe shrugs. 

“Okay, but Kylo is texting you to find him. Kylo is saying he can help, not that he knows where Luke is.”

“I don’t know, the whole thing is confusing!” Poe slumps down in one of the metal chairs opposite Finn. He puts his head in his hands. 

Finn is quiet for a moment. “Is this about you and Kylo?” Finn asks after awhile. “Do you think you’re too close to this whole thing?”

“Yes,” Poe says. “I’m too close, but I can’t…” he doesn’t want to say it’s Kylo. “Can we just keep going?”

“Okay,” Finn says.

Poe gets back up to pace. He talks about getting Han and coming back. About Leia putting him on this case, which gives him a renewed fervor. Leia trusts him. “You were there for the salvage yard,” he says. 

Finn nods. “Let me stop you there, though.” 

Poe looks at him. “Okay.”

“If my mom knew I was in a gang, and messing with one of her baby birds, she would blow a fuse. Any mom worth her salt would.”

Poe shrugs, “Maybe...” He can’t believe he’s about to even say this, “Leia isn’t a good mom?” And then, “Wait, am I the baby bird?” 

“Maybe,” Finn says looking sly. Then more seriously, “Chances are she knows something she’s not telling you. That Kylo isn’t telling you.”

“Don’t be a conspiracy theorist, Finn,” Poe says. 

“I’m not!” Finn laughs, holding his hands up. “Listen to me, man. If Kylo doesn’t know where Luke is, how does he know that he’s safe? If Kylo texted you those things to lure you back to meet him, and then leaves his phone, why? Why does he leave those clues for you? Why spell it out for you?” Finn shakes his head. “I’m telling you, there’s something else going on.”

“You mean aside from the mafia and possibly political scandal?”

“Shit’s weird man, that’s all I’m saying.”

 

That night Poe is sitting in his Cougar waiting for the sound to come in on the set. Kylo is micced up, a process that Poe doesn’t want to think about, Kylo walking into the agreed meeting place, Kylo taking off his shirt. Poe almost pushed Threepio out of the way, because it should be Poe with his hands on Kylo. Kylo leaves, and there’s an occasionally clearing of a throat, but not much else comes in.

Kylo is already in the building and Poe has a bad feeling about all of this. Soon enough, sound comes through. There’s a little bit of chat between Kylo and Snoke, but then a third speaks up.

“Good evening, gentlemen.”

“Ah, Mr. Hauser,” Snoke says, “thank you for joining us.” 

“The pleasure is mine, of course. You wanted to talk to me about pushing for a stronger drug legislation, correct?”

“Yes. Please sit.”

So far, Poe thought, everything was legal. Sort of. They talked about various laws to restrict designer drugs that were not prescription. It even sounded normal. Except Poe knew, knew that what they were talking about was tightening the grip on drug laws so that the drugs themselves would become more lucrative. The more illegal something was, the more money it brought in. 

Kylo rarely spoke up. It seemed he was here to just be Snoke’s number two in case anything went wrong. And aside from it being a mob boss talking to a lobbyist, there wasn’t anything to bust in the door about. Leia had told him this would take a while, which Poe hated. Waiting was the hardest part of anything. 

Poe keeps listening for anything that might tie back to Mayor Thrawn, but there’s not much there. He’s never directly mentioned, and there’s little to even prove that Snoke is in the wrong here. If he wasn’t a mob boss with a hand in the drug cartels, then the whole thing sounded normal.

The lobbyist leaves, and Snoke speaks up. “Well, our friend will be happy to hear of our progress,” he says. Poe desperately wishes he had eyes on the situation, but doesn’t dare sneak up to the building to check it out. 

“Yes,” Kylo says. “What’s our next move?” he asks, and there’s a pause.

Poe feel like he can’t breathe. Did Kylo just blow everything?

But then, a sigh. “We move forward, my child. There will be hardships ahead, but we will forge through. I will have you speak to our friend about the news.” Then, “I know I can depend on you to be discreet.”

“Of course,” Kylo says. 

“Good. It is unfortunate that your father survived, Kylo,” Snoke says. “But perhaps we will find another way for you to pledge yourself.”

Kylo says nothing. 

 

 

The next morning, Leia and Poe sit in a diner nearby with coffee, and wait. The stakeout is over for now, there’s little for Poe to do but wait until Kylo is ready from getting the mic off to talk. Leia is silent, contemplating her coffee, and Poe wonders if maybe she was a bad mother. The idea takes her off that pedestal he has her on. She’s a person, who’s made some mistakes, he thinks, but still a good person. 

Poe remembers that he didn’t have any breakfast, and is very tempted to get the pancakes. He flags down their waitress, and asks. Leia gives him the side eye, but says nothing. 

“Ben did good last night,” she says. 

“Yes, he did.” Poe doesn’t think he’s ever had a more stilted conversation.

Leia looks at him. “I know there’s not a lot going on right now, but it’s important that we build this case up very carefully. I don’t want any mistakes.” 

“Right.”

“We need a safe house for Ben, just in case,” she says.

“But the hacker has all the locations, what good is that going to do?”

Leia hums, says, “There’s a couple of locations locked away, on paper or word of mouth only. We can set him up in one of those if needed.” 

She looks at him, and says, “Can I talk to you for a moment not as a Captain?” 

“Off the record you mean?” Poe asks. 

“I mean, I need to ask you a personal question, and I don’t want you to think that you have to answer because I’m your commanding officer.”

Oh. Oh no. Poe knows where this is going, and he doesn’t want to be part of it. Somehow Leia has figured out that Poe likes Kylo, _oh God this is so embarrassing_. Poe feels himself slowly sink into the booth, thinking that maybe he could just slither out the door.

“Ben has always been a sensitive kid. Hard headed, but sensitive. He needs-” Leia clears her throat. At least this is uncomfortable for her too. “He needs someone who can stick with him through all this. He needs someone to believe in him.” Leia hasn’t asked a question, but it’s there: Can you? 

Poe wants to. He wants to believe in Kylo, in that what he’s doing is for the good. That Kylo wants to help is a good factor in Poe coming back to him, but the idea that Kylo could ever need someone is baffling. Kylo, to Poe, is a strong fortress of a man, and he needs no one. From the time that they met, as horrible as it was, Kylo stood alone. All Poe has seen of him is violence, manipulation and lies. But then, there are those moments, where Kylo blushes, or backs off when Poe asks, and Poe wonders if that’s Ben, the Ben that Kylo threw away, because he was so needy. 

Poe thanks the waitress as the pancakes arrive, and he tucks into them so he can avoid this conversation.

Kylo slides into the booth across them, and softly smiles, and his morning hair is fluffy and Poe wonders what it’s like to wake up to that, but focuses back on the pancakes for his own sake. 

Kylo says “Hi mom,” and Poe kind of feels like he’s intruding. The corner of Leia’s eyes crinkle up in happiness. 

“Your dad is okay, he’s getting out of the hospital this afternoon,” she says, and Kylo looks paler and nods. 

Poe is definitely intruding. He considers getting up to go to the bathroom so these two can have a modicum of privacy. He doesn’t, because Leia immediately moves on and is all business. “So Decective Dameron here will be working with you on this case,” she says. “We know that you need help taking down Snoke, and possibly someone else.” She slides a phone over. It’s an old Nokia, a flip phone. Good for making phone calls, and that was it. 

“Are we selling pot now?” Poe asks teasingly. 

“Focus,” she says, “This phone is our link to Ben, he’ll be able to contact us security on it. I’ve put in our numbers.”

“What we need,” she says, “is to run through a plan. If what you say is true,” she nods to Kylo, “then we have to take this very carefully.”

Kylo nods. 

“Ben, I’ve already talked to your superiors on this,” she says, and Kylo goes wide eyed, and looks out the window.

Poe is slow to catch up. “Superiors?” he asks. “What?” Poe looks over to Kylo, who’s fiddling with the phone. 

Leia looks between them both.

“You didn’t tell him,” she says to Kylo. 

Kylo sighs. “I’m working for the feds.”

“You’re not working with us anymore?” Poe can see where it might be necessary, but it still stings. 

“No, I mean, I’ve been undercover for a while.” 

Poe feels like his heart might stop. Undercover. Kylo has been undercover this whole time. Those things that didn’t make sense start to add up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We'll delve into Poe's reaction next chapter. Baby bird is in shock.
> 
> And a shout out to all my givers of comments and kudos: you keep me afloat. You truly are the wind beneath my wings.
> 
> Also due to real life, updates will be about once every week and a half. Sorry guys.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a filler chapter. Enjoy before shit gets crazy. 
> 
> Warning, there is talk about human trafficking. If this is triggering in any way, please do not read. Side note, there is phone sex in this chapter. If this makes you uncomfortable, feel free to skip this chapter.

The rest of the meeting is stilted, with Captain Organa feeling very awkward, and Poe staring at Kylo; Kylo refusing to meet his eyes. Poe tries to listen to Leia, but all he can think about are all those holes in the case being filled up. Finn was right, there was something else going on. And that something else was Kylo being undercover.

  
It makes so much sense, and Poe can’t believe he missed it. No wonder Leia wasn’t as worried or angry, she knew that Kylo was undercover.

  
Leia wraps up, and Kylo pockets the old burner phone. Poe slides out of the booth, and sits back in after Leia leaves. He still needs to pay for the food. Kylo waits, looking uncomfortable.

  
He should, Poe thinks bitterly. “Undercover, huh?” he says, trying to keep it light. It comes out sounding very sarcastic.

  
“Poe,” Kylo says. “I couldn’t tell you.”

  
Poe clenches his jaw. Naturally. What is there about Kylo that he does know? When will the sense of trust ever be renewed? Or was it ever there? Poe wonders. There’s little between them now, Poe thinks, except a sense of attraction, that want that permeated everything, every interaction.

  
“And now?” Poe asks.

  
“I still can’t really talk about it,” Kylo shakes his head. “You have to trust me.”

  
“Even from the start?” Poe asks. When Kylo threw so many punches that Poe threw up.

  
Kylo closes his eyes, nods. “I had to, I didn’t want to.”

  
Poe crosses his arms, looks down, his brows knitted together.

  
“When Hux came in,” Kylo says softly, “You have no idea what he’s capable of.”

  
Poe looks at him. “I’m not going to thank you for not torturing me as much as someone else could.”

  
“And I don’t expect you to,” Kylo says. “There’s nothing more I wanted to do than to get out of there.” Kylo is quiet for a moment. Then, “I know you don’t want to hear any of it.”

  
“You’re right,” Poe says, short.

  
Poe slams a twenty on the table and leaves.

 

That night, there’s another stakeout. This time, they wait outside Thrawn’s building. Poe hates that he has to do this with Kylo, but Kylo would know best what is going on. Kylo knows more than Poe, and it makes Poe crazy. The car is hot with silence.

  
So they wait, and Poe sees a man move towards the stoop of Thrawn’s house.

  
“That’s Hauser, the lobbyist,” Kylo says.

  
“Okay,” Poe says, leaning on his hand, arm propped on the window. They watch Hauser move in. Poe sighs. This still tells them squat. It just shows that Hauser and Thrawn are a little dirty, and Poe doesn’t even know what he’s doing on this fucking case anyways.

  
Kylo keeps looking over to Poe, tries to look into Poe’s eyes, but Poe won’t let him.

  
“We’re not going to get much here, Snoke and Thrawn are too careful,” Kylo says.

  
“Well what’s going to get the job done?” Poe asks. He just wants to be done. He’s so tired.

  
Kylo is silent for a while. “Maybe,” he says, “maybe what we need to do is set a trap.”

  
Poe says,”Oh God, what now.” He turns to Kylo finally. “The traps that you set can only be bad news.”

  
“This won’t be any better.”

  
Poe rolls his eyes.

  
“Okay,” Kylo says, “what about this, you come out as a dirty cop.”

  
Poe sighs. “I want to say that I’m listening, but no. Here’s an idea, that you reveal you’ve been undercover.”

  
“What would that do?” Kylo asks.

  
“It makes you a target,” Poe says. “It makes you go and reveal upfront all the stuff you’ve done with the mob, all the stuff Snoke is doing, and dirties Thrawn’s name.”

  
“It’s not enough,” Kylo says.

  
“What will be enough?” Poe snaps.

  
Kylo looks away, out the front window. Poe wants to scream he’s so frustrated. He feels his mouth tighten into a thin line.

  
“Ask me anything,” Kylo says, startling Poe, “and if I can answer, I will.”

  
“Where’s Luke?” Poe asks. And Kylo raises his eyebrow and grimaces.

  
“Okay, do you know where Luke is,” Poe amends.

  
“Yes and no.” Kylo says.

  
“What? Come on, that’s not an answer.”

  
“I know that he’s safe, but I don’t know where he is location wise,” Kylo says.

  
“You tipped him off?” Poe asks. He thinks back to Luke’s empty house, the family photo.

  
Kylo nods.

  
“What’s so important about Luke,” Poe asks. “I mean, I know Snoke wants to know where he is, what with him taking down the Empire, and Luke being your uncle…”

  
“I can’t- that’s not something I can talk about,” Kylo says.

  
Poe sighs. “Work with me, please?”

  
Kylo rubs his face. Then he seems to come to a decision. “There’s something you have to know,” Kylo says eventually. “Vader, the guy with the Empire?”

  
“I read about him, sure.”

  
“He was my granddad.”

  
Poe is stunned. Absolutely stunned. “Luke killed his dad?”

  
Kylo shakes his head. “That’s just it, he didn’t. Even got Vader to come clean, before the end. The Empire crumbled, but there were still parts leftover. And when Snoke found out my heritage…”

  
“The family business,” Poe drawls, realizing too late that might be offensive.

  
But Kylo just shrugs. “I didn’t know much about Vader, other than what rumors existed, and I didn’t know about him coming clean until just this past year.”

  
“What made you decide to go undercover?” Poe asks, because he’s been dying to know, what could turn someone like Kylo around.

  
“I-” Kylo clears his throat, looks out the passenger window for a minute. “I found out where all the money was going, found out what Snoke wanted. It was easy to accept the drugs, the violence, everything. But the money that Snoke launders through Thrawn and the businesses, it’s not just the drugs.” Kylo looks at Poe.

  
“What,” Poe asks, his breath gone.

  
“They’re selling people.”

  
The bottom drops out of Poe’s stomach.

  
“Trafficking?” He asks quietly.

  
Kylo nods. “We don’t have a direct hand in it, that’s what took me so long to even know, but once Snoke accepted me as his … understudy… I learned all the things that he wouldn’t tell the others. The cash flow comes from the drugs, but as a side business. The drug money is then used to pay for the human trafficking. Then that money is used to pay the drug cartels. We flow the money through different accounts offshore and through Panama. Our accountant has a hell of a time,” Kylo says. He’s trying to make light of the darkest situation, but it comes out raw. Everyone has their limits, and this is Kylo Ren’s.

  
Poe is stunned, absolutely. He doesn’t know what to do. What to say. That’s why it’s not enough.

  
Kylo speaks up again. “Ask me something else,” he says, his voice rough.

  
Poe desperately tries to think of something, anything.

  
“Why’d you text me?” He asks. He feels like it might be the dumbest question.

  
Kylo bites his lip. “I knew you,” he says, eventually. “I knew you worked for my mom, and I knew if I handed the information off to you, you would do something. The feds are taking too long.”

  
Poe doesn’t know what to say to that, so he just asks another question.

  
“Did you have to beat me up the next time we met?”

  
“I can’t just hand you a phone, Poe, Lower East Side is crawling with Snoke’s guys.”

  
“But the ciphers were for me?” Poe asks.

  
“Yes.”

  
Poe sighs. “Okay,” he says. “And you weren’t leading me at the impound lot?”

  
“Leading you?” Kylo shifts to face Poe, his arm landing between the bucket seats.

  
“Telling me to look after Snoke, then shooting your dad.”

  
“No,” Kylo says. His voice is rough. He turns to face the window again.

  
Then softly, Poe asks, “And kissing me?” He looks at Kylo, his body tight with tension.

  
The corner of Kylo’s mouth goes up. “Because I wanted to,” he says.

  
“That’s the worst line,” Poe says, voice low. He pauses. “Why’d you tell me all this stuff. I know you’re not supposed to.” He puts his hands up. “Not that I don’t appreciate it.”

  
Kylo finally looks back at Poe. “Because I trust you.”

  
Poe bites back his smile.

 

 

Poe is getting ready for bed later that night, sweat pants and t-shirt on, shuffling around in his socks when his phone buzzes.

  
/Ask me something else.

  
Number blocked. It’s Kylo.

  
//Here’s one, how are you even texting on that phone?

  
He sends it, and continues his night routine. He’s just gotten everything settled, BB8 on the bed, safety rail up, and in bed when his phone goes off again. He sighs and picks it up.

  
//One fucking letter at a time. I’m getting high school flashbacks.

  
Poe chuckles.

  
//what were you like in high school?

  
Poe can only imagine.

  
//Lanky, big eared, and big nosed.

  
//Cute

  
//I was not cute.

  
Poe can hear the indignant tone, despite the text.

  
//High school Poe would be into that.

  
Poe sits backs against the wall, the covers over his legs. He settles in, holding his phone, impatient.

  
//And what was high school Poe like?

  
//Horny as fuck.

  
Poe realizes he’s flirting, not only with Kylo, but with a line that really hasn’t been crossed yet. Sure, they’ve kissed, but this is something else.

  
//So Ben would be another boy to you?

  
Poe is almost offended.

  
//I’d treat Ben with the utmost respect. Take him to the movies, make out in my car, and drive out to the closest skinny dipping pond upstate.

  
There’s a long wait. Poe is waiting for the mother of all comebacks, or maybe he’s pushed too far. Instead his phone starts to ring. At first he’s startled. He didn’t expect for Kylo to call him. Almost in a haze, Poe answers.

  
“Hello?”

  
“You have no idea how crazy you drive me,” Kylo growls.

  
Poe’s face splits in a smile. “It’s what I do best,” Poe says proudly.

  
“That I have no doubt. You’d really do all that?” Kylo sounds hesitant. Poe would say shy, but that really doesn’t fit Kylo’s MO. In fact, Poe doesn’t know what Kylo is actually talking about until he remembers the text.

  
“I would totally woo high school you, yes,” Poe says.

  
There’s a sound; almost a laugh. Poe finds himself wondering what a full belly laugh would sound like, if he would ever hear one from Kylo, and if Kylo is even capable anymore.

  
“High school me would like that.”

  
“Of course,” Poe says, sliding down to his pillows, the sound of sheets against his skin. “I am an expert at wooing, especially of high school Ben,” he says. “Wait, that didn’t come out right.”

  
“I would hope so,” Kylo says, droll. “Do your charms work on anyone else? Or just me, fourteen years ago.”

  
“Well,” Poe says, wondering where this is going, totally knowing where this is going. “The dinner and movie is still a classic,” he says.

  
“Naturally,” Kylo replies.

  
“But it would be at my place. Make them feel as comfortable as possible. Maybe impress them with abuela’s secret recipe.”

  
“And what movie would we watch?”

  
Poe notices the pronoun shift but doesn’t bring it up. “We’d uh…watch a drama. Maybe a horror flick.”

  
“On a first date?” Kylo sounds skeptical.

  
“More cuddling opportunities,” Poe says, as Kylo makes a noise of understanding. “I have a plan, okay?”

  
“Mmm,” Kylo says, low. Poe feels like his whole body has turned to molten lava with how low Kylo’s voice has gotten. “Tell me more,” Kylo says.

  
Oh God what has Poe gotten himself into? “Well we can’t make out on the couch,” Poe says.  

  
“Oh?”

  
“I still need to drive you upstate.”

  
“I don’t think I’ve ever been skinny dipping,” Kylo admits, amused.

  
“You’ll be a natural at it, trust me. It’s like taking a bath, just more illicit.”

  
“Okay, I’m game. So we get there. I take my clothes off.”

  
“I check you out,” Poe says.

  
There’s a pause. “You’re not very good at this.”

  
“Give me a break! This phone call has really taken a turn, okay?”

  
“Yes, you’re right, it was strictly business before.” The sarcasm is dripping off Kylo’s voice.

  
“Okay, you take off your clothes and get in. I take my clothes off and join you. The water’s cold.”

  
“Why is the water cold? This really isn’t working.” Kylo sounds almost whiny.

  
“I said the fun of skinny dipping is the illicitness of it. Anyways, it’s super cold, but we don’t get caught. Splash around til our teeth start chattering.”

  
“Okay,” Kylo says, still unsure.

  
“Which is when we grab our clothes and head back to my car. We get in, clothes sticking to our bodies, and I crank the heat up.” Poe runs his fingers along his stomach. He can’t believe this is happening. Unless Kylo isn’t on the same page? Take it easy Dameron, Poe thinks. Kylo likes normal. “I slide my hand up your chest,” Poe says, softly. This is the turning point. It’s been a game until now. There seems to be the longest silence, until:

  
“I grab your hips in my hands, lean you back into the seat.”

  
Poe gasps, and starts running the fingers of his free hand along the edge of his boxer briefs, slipping under them slightly before treading along the line of hair between his hips. His body feels warm all over, and he can almost imagine it, Kylo hovering over him, Poe’s hips in his hands, Poe feeling that chest, cool and wet. “I reach around to your shoulders, run my fingers down your back, scratch around to your stomach, and open your jeans.”

  
“I open your jeans,” Kylo says, his voice rough. “I reach in and hold the base of your cock.”

  
“Oh God,” Poe says, imagining it. “I tug your pants open, and find you, and rub the top of your dick with my fingers,” he says as he reaches into his own boxer briefs to do the same. “I run my fingers down to the base, and hold you loosely.”

  
“Tighter,” Kylo commands, darkly. “I start to stroke you, evenly, running up to the head of your cock to find the liquid gathered there; slicking you up.”

  
“I hold you tighter,” Poe says. His hand is working over his own cock, not so evenly as Kylo would. Poe knows his hands are not as big. “I stroke you,” Poe says, breathless. “I-” Poe can’t think of what to say, except, “Are you?” _Are you with me? Are you touching yourself?_ He can’t bring himself to ask, even if he can talk about giving Kylo an imaginary hand job in the backseat of his car. “Are you?” he asks again.

  
“Yeah.”

  
“Fuck.” Poe works his hand over his cock faster, knowing he won’t last, and he might as well be a teenager again. “I’d blow you,” Poe blurts out, trying to follow the scenario, but only coming up with a list of what he’s longing to do to Kylo. And he hears the best moan, the moan that means that Kylo isn’t just listening to Poe jack off.

  
“I’d ride you after,” Kylo says, and that’s it for Poe. The image of Kylo, fully naked on top of him, rocking back and forth on Poe’s cock, eyes closed in pleasure, that hair wavy with sweat. The full line of Kylo’s throat shown to him, only him. Poe’s eyes close as the feeling of pleasure washes over him, his hips twitching, his toes curling.

  
Poe breathes heavy, as he listens to Kylo’s fast breath, the soft grunts. “I’d want that,” Poe says breathless.

  
“Fuck,” Kylo says, ragged. After that, there’s only the sound of Kylo’s uneven breath.

  
“That was, uh,” Poe says eloquently.

  
“Yeah,” Kylo answers. “We should do this in person sometime.”

  
“Masturbate?” Poe asks. He tries to not think about it too much.

  
“Sure,” Kylo answers, nonchalant. “I was thinking about anything you’re up for, but we can start there.”

  
Poe moans, one of pleasure, of pain knowing that Kylo is so much more smoother than Poe could ever be. Poe laughs, and says, “I need to clean up,” halfway wishing that Kylo was here so he could take care of him too.

  
Kylo hums, and Poe wonders if Kylo is going to fall asleep. If Kylo likes to just rollover after sex. Poe is more of the cuddling type.  He requires pillow talk, damn it. “I’ll see you tomorrow?” Poe asks.

  
“Before your commendation,” Kylo confirms.

  
They exchange goodbyes, and Poe hangs up. He falls asleep and dreams of a world where he and Kylo could just drive upstate to skinny dip, a world where their differences aren’t so big.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woo! Let's let them rest up a bit- Poe's going to get himself into trouble pretty soon...
> 
> Also, thank you for all the great kudos and comments! They warm my heart.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: There is torture in this chapter, so please be aware.

The next morning there’s a knock on Poe’s door. Poe opens his eyes, bleary and confused as to who could be calling at this hour. He shuffles out of bed and down the ladder to open the door, carrying BB8 with him. It’s Rey and Finn, both beaming.

“Your commendation is today!” Rey says, holding out a box of donuts. “I thought we could celebrate you being a great detective with a stereotype.” Finn raises a carrier of coffee cups.

“Guys…” Poe says. He lets them in and puts BB8 down. Rey and Finn make themselves comfortable on the couch, so Poe grabs the ottoman, but not before picking up the coffee cup. “It’s so early,” Poe moans.

“Well, the ceremony begins at eleven,” Finn says, picking up a glazed donut. 

“We’ll need to get you in your dress blues before then, so chop chop,” Rey says. She stuffs a donut in her mouth and chews. 

“There’s no point in me getting this thing other than the case,” Poe says, picking up a donut. “It should go to someone else.”

“Poe, you shot down a mob man, and you are so close to closing this case,” Finn says, earnest and firm. “You deserve this.”

Poe feels his heart warm at the two of his friends, so caring. “Okay,” he says.

 

He’s all dressed up in his blues, hat under his arm, he hasn’t pulled the white gloves on quite yet. He’s off to the Carnecia Loa again. Kylo texted him to meet here.  
He realizes that it’s here that it started. That the beginning was really him and Salacious Crumb sharing conchas looking for clues. It seems like a lifetime ago. He grabs his coffee and is debating on whether or not he should grab more horchata, when he feels a presence behind him. Poe whips around, and looks up to see Kylo. 

“Hey,” he says. He smiles softly. The look softens his whole face, makes his eyes seem warmer.

Poe feels his body warm with the reminder of last night in Kylo’s eyes. “Hey yourself,” he says. “Any news?”

Kylo shakes his head. “My,” he pauses. Takes a breath and tries again. “My handler thinks things are coming to a head. That I should start wearing a wire on the regular.”

Poe’s brows come together. “Is that even feasible?”

“Well I don’t get frisked on the regular, so it could be,” he says, sounding like the logic of it hurts him. “But the idea is tenuous at best.”

“Nice,” Poe says. “I’m not too sure about the idea either, but I’m no handler.”

Kylo raises an eyebrow. “I’d say you make a good one, but I don’t want to insult you.”

“Oh come on. I mean, who’s your handler anyway? Some crew cut in a suit?”

Kylo shakes his head. “Don’t know. I get distorted messages at various times and places. Could be anyone.”

Poe thinks about that and gets a chill. “So are you coming to my commendation?”

Kylo rolls his eyes. “You know I can’t.”

“Can’t believe you’re missing my big day,” Poe mock pouts. 

“It’s a ceremony for community service, not your quinceañera.”

Poe gasps. Looks slyly up and says, “You’d come for my quince? I’d wear white, as is traditional.”

Kylo tilts his head. “Purity?”

“And honor,” Poe confirms. 

“Well that’s you all over,” Kylo growls. He leans in and quickly kisses Poe on the mouth. 

Poe breaks the kiss reluctantly. “I have to go. Commendation in twenty minutes.”

Kylo nods, and bumps his head against Poe’s. “I can wait,” he says, a repetition of the scene on the couch, a promise for later.

 

 

The detectives of the precinct are present. Poe can recognize some of the other officers in the crowd, Pava and Calrissian. The whole thing is interminable, no matter how Rey and Finn put it. Thrawn walks up, and Poe just wants to go ahead and arrest this guy. Thrawn gives a perfect speech about a safer city, about New York’s finest being the front lines, and all Poe wants to do is reach for his weapon and aim. This bastard has been bringing drugs in and transporting people out, and Poe feels himself shaking. He takes a few deep breaths to calm down and looks out to the crowd. He sees Captain Organa giving him one of those “I see you” mom looks. 

Thrawn finally presents the award, a tiny little bar that Poe still thinks should go to someone else. But he smiles for the cameras and shakes Thrawn’s hand. That deserves an award of its own, but not this one. 

“For exemplary service to the community,” Thrawn says, and pins the green bar on Poe’s suit jacket. Poe feels his face freeze into a smile as the cameras flash all around them.

The rest of the commendation is speeches and other officers being awarded. Poe can’t wait to get off the stage and get back to work. 

The Captain comes up to him and shakes his hand. “Congratulations Detective Dameron,” she says . Thrawn approaches them. 

“I’d like to invite you over to a party I’m hosting after this. Today has been a good day for our city.”

Captain Organa smiles at Poe. “Of course,” she says, “We’d be honored Mayor Thrawn.”

“For networking purposes. I honestly can’t last long at them. I hate hobnobbing,” Thrawn replies.

Poe watches his Captain raise her eyebrow and smile. “We’d be delighted, Mayor Thrawn,” she says. Poe’s got to give it to her: she didn’t laugh at the word hobnobbing. Though to be fair, Thrawn looked like the word itself tasted horrible.

In the car riding over to Thrawn’s, Leia turns to Poe. “This is the perfect opportunity,” she says, and says nothing else. Poe knows.

At the party, Poe finds himself caught in a lot of terrible conversations. If he has to small talk one more time about gluten, he might rub bread in Stewart’s eye. Finally he spots his chance and makes a break for it. He goes upstairs under the pretense of a bathroom, the oldest trick in the policeman’s handbook. He sidesteps to the study, which is locked, but Rey has taught him a thing or two about unlocking doors. So he’s up there and then he’s searching through all the files and drawers for something, anything on the case. And he finds it: papers marking money going through different accounts. Laundering. So Poe takes a picture with his phone and sends it off to the Captain, and makes his way downstairs. Where at the very bottom, Thrawn is waiting. 

“Got lost,” Poe says, trying to look earnest and stupid. “Looking for that second bathroom, you know.” 

Thrawn smiles after a moment. “Of course,” he says. “I understand. Sometimes it’s too spacious for even me.”

Poe goes home that night on a high. He’s getting close to closing the case. He can almost taste it, even. There’s a knock on the door, and Poe thinks that it’s a little odd at this hour, but thinks it might be Kylo. Maybe he’s learned his lesson about breaking into Poe’s apartment. 

Standing at the door is three guys, all big and beefed up. Poe slams the door back shut, but one of them gets their foot in the door, and elbows his way in. The other two pull their guns out, and aim for Poe. Poe’s gun is in his safe, like it’s supposed to be, so there’s no way to go about this except fist first. 

He swings out for the first guy but one of the other guys run up behind him before he can do anything but miss, and hits him on the head with the butt of the gun. Poe goes down. 

Poe is aware that they’re manhandling him, taking his arms behind his body and using a zip tie to fasten them together. Everything seems far off and blurry, in slow motion. A concussion, he thinks, and that’s when they throw a pillowcase over his head. They hit him once more, and Poe tries desperately to not throw up. They drag him down the stairs and throw him in a vehicle. Poe is trying to remember every detail, every turn, but he’s so dizzy with pain and his head injury he doesn’t know if he’s kept it straight or not. He manages to not pass out at least, and they drag him stumbling all the way down some stairs and into a room. 

They zip tie him to a chair, legs to chair legs, arms to armrests, and Poe becomes very aware that his fingers are vulnerable like this. He tries not to think about bamboo manicures. He keeps having to talk to himself, jerking one way or the other to keep awake. 

He’s getting flashbacks to when Kylo and he first met, but the idea is horrid because Kylo is so different than what he seemed at first, and then maybe then it’s all a dream? He has to wake up.

He hears footsteps. There’s nothing for a while, just the two of them breathing, and then there’s this: “Cops like you don’t last long.” Poe’s eyes widen, because not that long ago he heard the word hobnobbing in that same disgusted tone. Thrawn. 

Thrawn doesn’t move to take Poe’s pillowcase off for a dramatic tête-à-tête, and Poe is wondering what is even happening, when he hears Thrawn walk out. 

Poe is alone. He can’t think, he’s so tired. But he has to wake up. Because if he wakes up all this goes away, right? At least that’s what he’s thinking when the door opens again. He’s dragged back in his chair and leaned back against a surface, it could be anything, a table, a sink, Poe can’t tell.

His head is forced backwards. Which is when the water starts. There’s no more air. Poe is slowly drowning, and he knows it’s just his brain trying to restart and save his body, but it’s killing him little by little. He can’t breathe, and every time they stop for a minute, there’s nothing, they don’t even ask questions, and Poe starts to realize that this might be it, the end of Poe Dameron, and then they stop. The chair clunks forward, and Poe slumps in it, taking long gulps of air. 

They leave him alone for a while after that. 

Then he hears the door open again, and he’s waiting, waiting for the right time to spring out the right words that will blow everyone away. Instead the sopping wet pillowcase is ripped off his head, and standing there before him is Snoke and Kylo Ren.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, sorry about the long wait, but this chapter was a nightmare to get out. 
> 
> Also, awful cliffhanger. 
> 
> But despite that thanks for all the comments and kudos! They give me life.


	14. Chapter 14

The walk down to the basement of Werkstatt seems interminable. Kylo walks behind Snoke, unsure of what is going on. There’s a niggling thought in his head, as if to say, _yes you do_.

The wire Kylo has on itches, the tape against his skin beginning to peel from sweat. 

Thrawn was here. He ignored Kylo and talked to Snoke about something in the office. Kylo cleaned the dirt from underneath his fingernails. There’s no way he could be in there without looking suspicious. He’s in deep enough as it is. 

All those excuses. 

Let me talk to him, he had said. That was the beginning. When Poe was just someone who knew where his uncle was, who had information that Snoke wanted, that Kylo couldn’t let Poe actually give. 

Let me get in contact with him, I’ll lead him to us. 

Let me comprise a puzzle for him to solve, he’ll want to save me.

Let me let Oola go, he’ll believe I’m a good person. That I’m worth the trouble. 

Let me have him figure out that you want me to kill Han Solo, he’ll bring him right back to the city.

Let me be the one to meet him, I’ll tell him that I want out. 

Let me shoot Han Solo.

Let me tell him about Thrawn, I’ll create a case, let me tell him everything, let me deal with him. I’ll tell him I’m on his side.

Kylo is leading a life in pleads and compromises. Every move he makes is watched by the feds, and every move he makes is okayed by Snoke. The problem, of course, is Poe.

The more he asked to deal with Poe, the more it looked like he was coming up with excuses to see him, to be with him. 

Snoke had to know. 

Snoke and Thrawn came out of the office, and Kylo stood up straight.

“Follow me,” Snoke said.

And that brings him to now, and Kylo follows Snoke to the basement.

There’s a man tied to the chair, a wet pillowcase over his head.

Snoke rips it off. It’s Poe. 

Snoke looks at Kylo, and Kylo knows that there’s a million things being said in that look. That Snoke knows that all those times Kylo asked to deal with Poe, that it wasn’t just head games he was playing with the cop. Snoke knew it and still loosened that leash he has on Kylo. Let him go a little astray. Let him get mixed up with Poe. This is Kylo’s punishment. 

Snoke looks at Poe, his face warped in a sneer. “This is a cop,” Snoke says. 

Kylo takes a breath, feels cold.

“He was found sniffing around where he shouldn’t.”

Poe’s eyes are drifting, trying to focus on either of them, and his face is wrought with emotion. 

Kylo feels his heart thud. “What do you want?” he asks. Maybe he can work this out, maybe he can save them both. Maybe all Snoke wants is information, Kylo thinks, hoping desperately. 

“I want you to kill him. And I will watch.”

Poe takes in a sharp breath and starts coughing.

Kylo closes his eyes, trying to keep control of his every move. It shouldn’t be hard, he’s been doing it for years. 

“Make it slow,” Snoke says, looking at Kylo considering. “This will be your final test.”

Kylo looks at Poe.

This is it. Snoke knows that Kylo is dealing with Poe, that Kylo is working for the feds. He doesn’t have to say it, Kylo knows that Snoke knows. 

Kylo is aware of Snoke’s every move. Snoke groomed him to be his son, to be the one to take over when Snoke was inevitably killed. Snoke handed him a kingdom, saw the potential in Kylo. And Kylo soaked it up. He cherished it, even. Here was his chance to make something of himself, to be more than Ben Solo ever could be.

But Poe made Kylo feel like he could transcend everything that Kylo Ren was, to be a good man. To do the impossible.

Kylo wants to turn to Snoke and ask if he could do something, anything else. What could keep him in Snoke’s good graces for just a little while longer.

Kylo pulls out the knife strapped to his thigh holster. If he does what Snoke says, Kylo can’t carry on with the feds anymore. Kylo can’t see his parents anymore. Kylo Ren will only be Snoke’s. And Snoke will slowly destroy him, starting now. There will be no Ben left, only ashes. 

But it’s the only life Kylo knows.

He feels himself take a step forward, towards Poe. Poe frowns at him, a look to say that Kylo can’t be doing this. 

Kylo thinks back to this morning at the Carnecia Loa. How seeing Poe made him feel warm, how he loved being in Poe’s presence. How he’d promised to wait for Poe. Those promises weren’t lies. But it looks like they will never come to fruition now.

He looks back at Snoke one more time. 

“Kylo,” Poe rasps. “Kylo please.”

Kylo swallows. Looks down to the knife, jagged and clean. It’s about to do a terrible thing in Kylo’s hands. Because that’s all Kylo is meant for. 

Kylo looks at Poe and thinks back. About how Poe led him to this, how Poe made him believe that there could be a life beyond this; selling bodies and killing souls. Poe makes him believe, and Snoke makes him die the slowest death, wants Kylo and Poe to die. 

“I’m sorry,” he says. He knows what has to happen next.

Snoke taunts him: “You were broken, I put you together, gave you purpose,” he says. Putting that final nail in the coffin.

Kylo turns and rams the knife into Snoke’s stomach. It sticks, and with all his strength he drags up, gutting Snoke. Blood covers his hand, it’s splattered on his face, and he grabs Snoke by the arm before he can drop to the floor. “I was never yours,” Kylo says. 

Snoke gurgles, shocked, blood flowing out his mouth. Kylo slits his throat, and it’s over.

“What the hell,” Poe says. 

Kylo takes his eyes off Snoke’s husk of a body, bleeding out, and turns to Poe. 

Poe looks utterly confused, even mad. 

Kylo slips the knife back in its case. He strides over to Poe, and clasps Poe’s head in his hands, and kisses him ever so gently on the forehead. “Are you okay?” Kylo asks, looking Poe in the eyes, and Poe just nods, short and jerking. Kylo pulls the knife back out to cut Poe’s ties.

Poe rasps out, “The case,” and Kylo shakes his head.

“I can’t do this without you,” Kylo says. He means the case, he means everything. Snoke would have kept Kylo, but Kylo wouldn’t have been able to carry on.

Kylo picks up Poe, slinging an arm around his waist, and together they stumble out. There’s two people in the hallway. Poe groans. Kylo pushes Poe gently up against the wall, and pulls out the knife once more. The woman has a gun, so Kylo has to deal with her first. She shoots, and hits Kylo’s left shoulder. He flinches back, but swings up with the knife, cutting her right arm. She hisses, shakes the arm out and Kylo throws a hard punch to her head, knife gripped in hand. She grunts and falls back.  
The man runs up behind Kylo and grabs his arm, and presses down, and Kylo growls as the knife goes into his thigh, easy as that. Kylo knocks his head back, and the guy shouts, and Kylo can feel the crunch of the guy’s nose on the back of his head. 

“Fuck!” the guy says. Kylo turns and his fists fly, pushing the guy’s arms out of the way, and knocks him on the head with the handle of the knife, and the guy goes down, cold. 

Kylo turns, and at the end of the hall is Phasma. Her eyes are wide, and her mouth tight. Phasma could take them both on. Poe is getting stronger, if not completely lucid, and now Kylo is injured. Phasma could end this for the both of them.

But she rolls her eyes, mutters something under her breath and pulls out a gun from behind her back. “Follow me,” she says, and leads the way to the door, shooting down the few people that come running up, senseless anger in their eyes. 

Kylo turns at the door to thank her. 

“I’ve always wanted to open a restaurant in Moravia, somewhere,” she says. She clasps Kylo’s shoulder. “Besides, I saw this one coming. You’re too much of a romantic.”

Kylo’s mouth gapes open, but Poe just reaches for her other hand (he can’t possibly reach her cheek) and kisses it. “Thank you,” Poe says.

She smiles. “Now get out of here,” she says, and they walk onto the empty street.

“We have to get you to a hospital,” Poe says. 

“I can’t,” Kylo says. There a million things standing in their way, but Kylo knows the easy way out. He has to leave.

Poe looks at him. “What?” 

“No hospitals.”

“Why?”

“I just ruined a huge case for the feds. They’ll have me-” he stops. Sighs. They’ll run him through the ringer, and all Kylo can do is get the hell out of Poe’s life.

“Come with me,” Poe says. “Please.”

Kylo runs his hands through his hair, and turns at the sound of wheels on pavement. It’s a large black van, and Kylo knows that it’s over. The feds are here. 

They all come tumbling out, furious. Except there’s one, bearded and calm.

“Uncle Luke?” he asks, strained.

“What the hell were you thinking, Organa-Solo? You just blew this case!” says one of the feds. Agent Goldsmith.

Luke holds his hand up, and this seems to mysteriously shut him up. “I’m so proud of you,” Luke says, clasping Kylo’s face. Kylo blinks, feels his eyes start to water, and hates himself for it. Luke holds him again. 

“Great,” says Goldsmith, “but all we got is audio, the whole thing is in shambles!”

“Ben was wearing a wire,” Luke says, turning around. “He made a judgment call and you should trust him.”

Kylo keeps blinking back tears, his head down. He can’t believe this. He cannot be- 

“He saved me,” Poe rasps. “If you caught audio of what just happened, you have a good case. There’s not much of the mob left, now.”

“Snoke kept paperwork at Werkstatt,” Kylo says blankly, looks at Poe, feeling too much all at once. Kylo cannot be this trusted-

At Kylo’s nod, the feds swarm in the restaurant to wrap up the case. Agent Goldsmith walks up and points a finger at Kylo. “You better not run off,” he warns.

“He’ll be at the hospital, fuck face,” Poe says. 

Luke is on the phone for an ambulance, and then hangs up.

“I’m going to call your mom in a minute,” he says. “But first, we should talk while we wait for the ambulance.” He leads them to the van and sits on the bumper. Kylo leans against the hood, and Poe stands. 

“I’ll uh,” Poe says, thumbing over to where a family discussion is not about to go down.

“Nonsense!” Luke says. “I trust you Detective Dameron.” There’s a twinkle in his eye that looks like he wants to add something else, but refrains. “I got your message,” he says to Kylo. “And I knew I had a choice. I could keep running, or I could face the past. So I contacted the agent who placed me and told her I would be coming back to work on your case. She said no, but I came back anyway. I became an adviser on your case, Ben.” 

Kylo looks down. 

“I know you’ve had decisions of your own to make, and tonight you did the right thing.” Luke slides a look over to Poe. “You take care of him,” he says. Luke stands up and pulls his phone back out of his pocket. 

Poe and Kylo stand in silence for a bit. “You still gonna make a run for it?” Poe asks, staring at the ground. 

“No,” Kylo says softly. “Will you?”

Poe shakes his head. “I’m not going anywhere, Kylo.”

Kylo croaks out a strange laugh. “Ben is okay.”

“Is it okay with you?” Kylo hears sirens, police, signaling to clear traffic, emergency.

Kylo pauses. “Kylo is a big part of me, of who I was. But I’d like to be Ben with you.” Maybe this time Ben can do it right.

“Okay,” Poe says. “Ben,” he says, trying out the word on his tongue. 

The police come in, and expecting the 8-7, he’s surprised to see his mom’s precinct there.

Leia runs out of the first car and swoops in to hug Ben. “Oh thank God,” she says, rocking his large frame back and forth. “You’re safe.” Ben slowly puts his arms around her, unsure how to reciprocate. He cannot be this trusted. He cannot be this loved. He feels his mother tremble in his arms, and he holds her closer.

Poe slowly backs away, to where he’s almost tackled by Finn and Rey. 

“Are you alright?” Rey practically shouts. 

“Concussed, for sure. Nothing a doctor can’t fix.” Poe looks back to where Ben and Leia are, and back to his friends.

Kylo— Ben, looks down to his mother in his arms. 

He feels like for the first time in a long time maybe things will work out. That maybe he can be all the things that people believe him to be: trusted, loved.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OH MY GOD THIS TOOK FOR FUCKING EVER. I apologize for the wait, but hope this chapter was worth it. Kylo is a bitch to write, and I hope I did this story some justice in this chapter.
> 
> What a journey, guys. Thanks for sticking it out with me, and giving me feedback and kudos. That really helped me keep going, you don't even know. 
> 
> Next up, epilogue porn, with bonus tying up loose ends!!


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is fluff and porn. That's all. Maybe some emotional hangups solved. But mostly porn.

Poe comes home to the smell of bacon. Ben is standing at the stove, spatula in hand, pancake batter on his arms.

“Hey handsome,” Poe says, leaning up to peck Ben’s cheek.

“Breakfast will be ready soon,” Ben yawns. Poe nods and heads over to the closet to hang up his coat. When he’s finished he turns to look at Ben. Therapy three times a week has been working out okay for him, and Poe joins him for a couple’s counseling session once a week. Poe just got back from his own therapist, mornings being the best time of the day for him and for Ben, as Ben is not a morning person by any means. 

Moving in together had been their latest ordeal, getting a new place, knowing the other’s routines, but not being a part of that, knowing that this was a step, a big deal in their relationship. Captain Organa wouldn’t say anything at work, but afterward she would give Poe these sly looks, or particularly harsh ones after a big argument with Ben, and Poe would be reminded once again that his boyfriend was his boss’s son, and sometimes that would set them off on a whole new argument. 

Ben may be working as a consultant to the feds and not a mobster anymore, but that didn’t mean their relationship was all roses. 

But this morning felt easy and light, no work looming over them today, just breakfast and a queue on Netflix to go through. Ben liked Korean love stories, while Poe liked crime dramas. Ben would roll his eyes. “Don’t you get enough of this shit day in and day out?” 

Poe would claim it was for research purposes, and Ben would squint at him, clearly not believing a word of it, and poke Poe in the side at that one spot that made his whole body twitch in ticklishness. 

Poe sets the table and helps himself to a third cup of coffee. 

Ben has moved on to the pancakes, blearily pouring the batter into the pan before standing in front of the stove like a soldier waiting on orders. 

“You had any coffee yet?” Poe asks, concerned for Ben’s safety, and for his own.

Ben just grunts and nods to the now empty cup on the counter next to him. Poe rinses it out and fills it again. Ben takes it gently, and smiles softly at Poe.

It’s stuff like this that makes it worth it, Poe thinks. The soft smiles, the easy weekend mornings, the way Ben will hesitate before kissing him sometimes, that makes it all worth it.

They eat breakfast in near silence, Ben working on the Times crossword puzzle, and Poe reading the front pages. 

Ben sighs and puts down his pen (because the nerd does it in pen, of course he does, Poe first thought) to look at Poe.

Poe feels Ben’s eyes on his skin and looks up. “Stuck?” he asks. 

Ben shakes his head. “Can I ask you a favor?” Ben says. He only does this when he’s afraid the answer is no, or he doesn’t want to be asking, but is re-learning that it’s wrong to just take. 

Poe nods.

“Will you hold me on the bed?”

Poe gets up and goes to the bedroom, knowing that Ben will follow. They arrange themselves on the bed; Poe is the big spoon. 

“You want to talk about it?” Poe asks, squeezing tightly for a moment.

Ben shakes his head. “It’s not important.”

“What would Ashli say about that?” Ashli was Ben’s therapist, the one who held the couple counseling. 

Ben huffs out an angry sigh. He’s quiet for a moment before saying: “Last night I thought about how we met. That we can’t tell people, because it’s not right, or normal.”

Poe thinks about that for a moment. There’s nothing but truth in that. “Why is it important that we met normally?” He means that he’s glad to have Ben, regardless of how they met.

“What are we going to tell everyone?” 

“That we met networking.”

Ben busts out a rusty laugh. He’s getting better at the practice of it, but his sense of humor is dark. Ben looks over his shoulder at Poe for a moment, thinking. “And if we have kids?”

Poe freezes. “You want kids?”

Ben shrugs. “Not really. I thought you might.” 

“Look, that’s a whole ‘nother can of worms,” Poe says. “Isn’t it just important that we met?” Although Poe can’t help but imagine a little girl that would have all the fierceness of Ben, and all the righteousness of Poe. She would be a hurricane, and they would love her.

“I’d like to start over,” Ben says. “Meet you as one of my mom’s detectives, maybe kiss you on the porch and have my parents flick the lights.”

Poe thinks that through. The idea of Ben and him meeting before the mob ruined the both of them. But the truth was that they met in a dark room, and while Poe ran his mouth, Ben stabbed his leg. 

“We could still kiss on your mom’s stoop, Ben.” Leia totally would flick the lights. Poe’s already gotten the shovel talk from Han and Chewie. At least that’s what Poe thought what was happening. Chewie may have been just showing off his arm strength by looking at Ben in the next room, glaring at Poe and ripping a coconut in half barehanded. “But I think it’s important that we went through all that shit together. That we’re still working through it.” Poe kisses Ben’s freckled shoulder. “We can play what ifs, but what’s important is that we’re together, not how it happened.”

Ben hums, and turns over in Poe’s arms, their legs knocking together, sheets rustling. Poe adjusts the blankets over them, the winter’s cold seeping in through the window. 

Ben reaches up and thumbs along Poe’s cheekbone. “I love you,” he says, and Poe just melts. Poe knows, but sometimes Ben has a hard time saying it. But the times that he can, Poe soaks it up.

“Love you too,” he says, leaning forward, brushing his lips up against Ben’s. His lips are warm and full, always plush against Poe’s own. Ben nuzzles up against Poe, his nose bumping up on the bridge of Poe’s eyes, pressing delicate kisses on Poe’s eyelids before sliding down and nuzzling into the crux of Poe’s neck, sighing softly. They hold each other for a moment like that, breathing each other in, limbs tangled. 

Poe runs his hands up and down Ben’s back, the rise and fall of his chest a strange comfort, the knowledge that Ben was alive, and here, still trying. Ben rises out of the crook of Poe’s neck to kiss him again, and Ben pulls up onto his knees, knocking the covers aside. 

“Dude it’s cold,” Poe complains, grabbing him to pull Ben back down, trying to wrestle the duvet over them both. 

“You’ll be warm enough in a minute,” Ben says, growls more like, and chuckles at Poe’s squawk. Ben runs his hands down Poe’s sides, Poe’s hips tilting up at the action. 

“Alternatively you could be under the covers until I’m too hot?” Poe asks, lifting a leg to wrap around Ben’s waist.

Ben pauses, and gives Poe a look. Poe knows this look from months of Ben. It says: ‘Are you really arguing about this with me?’ But Ben tilts his head and looks down and to the side; re-evaluating. “I want you to see,” he says finally, looking at Poe, wrapping an arm around Poe’s leg. He rubs his thumb on the scar where he stabbed Poe.

Poe can’t argue with that. “Okay,” he says. 

Ben’s lips twitch up in a roguish smile. Poe groans and tilts his head back. Ben like this is a force to be reckoned with, and Poe loves it when Ben is like this. 

Ben rubs Poe’s leg still wrapped around him and pulls it away, scoots back until he’s on his hands and knees between Poe’s legs. He’s laying down, tugging Poe’s jeans open when Poe stops him. “Wait,” he says, thinking, wanting. 

“What?” Ben looks the teeniest bit frustrated to be pulled away from his end goal, but Poe wants a part of it too.

“Swing up here,” Poe says, leaning up. “I wanna suck your cock too.”

Ben eyes flutter, and he strips out of his sleep pants and puts his hips next to Poe’s head, and Poe has to scoot down and Ben’s legs are all curled up next to Poe’s head. Ben is already at Poe’s pants again when Poe tries to pull Ben’s leg up. 

“What now?” Ben growls, already holding the base of Poe’s cock, clumsily trying to follow the direction Poe is pulling him into.

“Over me,” Poe says, eager to start, wanting it to be just right.

Ben sighs and swings his leg up over Poe’s head, straddling Poe’s face, cock full and ready, waiting for Poe’s mouth. Poe guides Ben’s dick inside his mouth, hands on Ben’s hips as Ben grunts and starts sucking at the base of Poe’s length, rolling Poe’s balls in his hand, noisily working his way back up to the tip. 

Meanwhile Poe opens his throat as he guides Ben in deeper, loving the feeling of cock in his throat, choking on the width of Ben, saliva running out his mouth already as Poe grabs Ben’s ass and urges him to thrust a little.

Ben moans on Poe’s cock and juts his hips in soft jerks into Poe’s mouth. 

Ben is mostly useless when he’s having his dick sucked by Poe, and they both forget this every time. So Ben is trying to fuck Poe’s throat as gently as possible, Poe still making gagging noises in between all the moans, while Ben does his best to focus on Poe, Poe’s cock, the crease between his hip and thigh, wiry hairs brushing Ben’s face as he rubs his face and mouth all over, clenching onto Poe’s thighs. 

Poe pushes up on Ben’s hips and Ben whines, his dick twitching, slick with Poe’s saliva. Poe gives himself a moment to feel proud, then scoots back and up, leaning up against the headboard, forcing Ben to spread his legs to get over Poe’s shoulders, ass now in the air. Ben moans as Poe spreads Ben’s cheeks and licks the crease leading up to Ben’s hole, pink and waiting.

Ben’s hips twitch. If he’s useless getting his cock sucked, he’s a goner when Poe eats him out. Ben gasps as Poe blows gently over the pink hole, before going back in and licking. Poe feels like he could be doing this for hours, and maybe he has been, driving his tongue in before circling the entrance with his finger, shallowly fucking Ben with his digits before laving the area again with his tongue, switching back and forth between the two actions before finally getting two fingers, then three in, and hearing the gasping breaths of Ben at the foot of the bed. Poe pulls back to see his handy work and notes that Ben’s ass is red from beard burn. He should shave soon, but it’s stuff like this that makes him pause.

“Turn around,” Poe says, his throat feeling raw. He leans over to grab the lube and condom from the bed stand drawer. They’ve both been tested, but are waiting on the results. 

Ben looks wrecked. Poe knows that’s about to change. Because as much as he loves driving Ben into a useless pile of bones, when he fucks Ben, that’s when it gets good, because Ben takes charge, gets a look in his eyes that means he’ll ride Poe into the sunset if need be, because this makes him feel powerful like nothing else could. 

Poe loves it.

Ben rearranges himself, sitting on Poe’s legs. He’s a picture, splayed out, cock hard and twitching, sweat already running down his chest, dark eyes swallowed by pupils. Poe tosses the lube at him, and Ben immediately gets to work, fingers crooked into himself, already somewhat stretched from Poe’s mouth. He’s got one hand on the bed, the other stretched under and in, his thighs straining under the awkward position of hovering over Poe’s legs, fingers inside himself. Poe’s cock twitches just looking at him.

Poe rolls on the condom and grabs more lube, slowly stroking himself as he watches Ben. Ben looks fierce, dangerous, panting as he tries to thrust his fingers into his ass, and Poe gently grabs that hand and tugs, and Ben looks at him. Poe watches as Ben crawls up Poe’s body, straddling and joining his hand with Poe’s to guide Poe into him. 

Ben sinks down with a hiss. He grabs Poe’s shoulder and leans back and starts lifting himself up to sink back down, and Poe just holds on. Ben rides him slow, rolling his hips and panting, and Poe can feel the warmth inside his core spread out, to his thighs, and he knows he’s not going to last long. Which is just as well, because Ben’s hip are stuttering and his pace is losing it’s evenness already. What was the slap of skin coming together is now Ben grinding on Poe’s cock, and Poe feels himself shaking from the change, the sparks of warmth building. 

Poe lets the feeling of pleasure wash over him, before leaning up and licking a stripe up Ben’s neck, grazing his teeth along the tendons, wanting so desperately to bite down hard, but knowing that Ben’s anger would ruin this moment, so Poe sucks gently, the boundary almost as hot as the idea of doing it. Poe bites at Ben’s chin, and Ben hunches his torso, and captures Poe’s lips with his own. Poe sighs, the soft and full lips a familiar pleasure, feeling Ben’s breath against his mouth as they breathe through these last few moments. 

Ben wraps both arms around Poe’s shoulders, and grabs onto Poe’s hair and moans, hips jerking. He’s close. Poe reaches down between them to Ben’s cock, and starts stroking, keeping the same pace as Ben’s hips.

Ben gasps, gasps, and shuts his eyes, grits his teeth and comes. Ben always comes like it’s being ripped from him, like he holds on as tight as he can and it’s pulled from him, taken. White streaks paint over Ben’s torso, over Poe’s hand. 

Poe rides out the clenching of Ben’s body on his cock, holding Ben close to him. 

Ben keeps clenching, and after a moment, pulls Poe forward so that Poe is between his legs, cock still inside, Ben on his back. 

Poe thrusts and thrusts, and that’s it, he’s coming, jerking forward and yelling, but he’s not even sure what he’s saying, just that noise is escaping while his body is falling apart and being put back together, and he seizes up and his whole body twitches hard, and he drops on top of Ben.

Ben huffs, but runs his hands over Poe’s back. 

Poe’s heart is going a mile a minute, and he’s always amazed at the swath of feelings his body can produce when he’s with Ben. 

He feels his cock slip out of Ben’s body and Ben sighs. Poe pulls the condom off and ties it, throws it in the trashcan next to the bed. 

Sweat cools his body, and he starts fumbling for the duvet again, and Ben chuckles. Poe finally gets the covers over them again, and Ben turns to tuck his body into Poe’s arms. “Sorry,” Ben says.

Occasionally he’ll say this, as a generality, and Poe has learned to roll with it. There’s a million things that Ben has to work through. That they have to work through together. Trust, and what that looks like, and forgiveness for past actions, and the acceptance of that forgiveness. Everyone’s got their own hangups. They were blessed with more.

“Well, you kissed it better, what more could a guy ask for?” Poe asks, gently squeezing Ben.

Ben hums. “Korean crime dramas,” he says.

Poe laughs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YOU GUYS. THANK YOU. Seriously, I would not have made it without all your lovely comments and kudos. They've kept me going even when this fic went [ off the rails](https://wingedbears.tumblr.com/post/144483431378/the-ending-that-was). You are the best readers. I want to thank each one of you, especially those that I bugged when I was worried. You guys are the wind beneath my wings. 
> 
> I hope this ending satisfies, it was all I wanted for them, the idea of settling, of healing together, of a possible future. And for Kylo|Ben to ride Poe.
> 
> Come say hi on [ tumblr](https://wingedbears.tumblr.com)!

**Author's Note:**

> A fic for my first fandom love, Star Wars. Constructive criticism welcome. Thanks for reading!


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